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poetix
08-06-2009, 10:29 PM
Mine's Gnosticism, naturally.

But there are loads to choose from - I mean specifically the heresies historically identified as such by the church authorities. Extra points for being really horrendously persecuted; if you had a crusade against you, even better.

Any other definition of heresy shall be considered, for purposes of this thread, heretical.

Penitenziagite!

nomadthethird
08-06-2009, 11:13 PM
The Huguenots have a massacre to their credit and got a war started so I'm assuming they count.

http://img5.imageshack.us/img5/641/hugforside.jpg

Predestine that, assholes.

bassbeyondreason
08-06-2009, 11:24 PM
Literacy.
or
Whichever Current 93 one involves Noddy.

STN
09-06-2009, 01:11 PM
Am I allowed the Pelagian one?

Mr. Tea
09-06-2009, 01:26 PM
Atenism. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atenism)

josef k.
09-06-2009, 01:37 PM
Church of Jesus Christ the Kidnapped.

empty mirror
09-06-2009, 01:52 PM
darwinism!

empty mirror
09-06-2009, 01:54 PM
Atenism. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atenism)
^ ah that's cool.

i like mithraism myself.

it's all sun worship. seems silly to say my sun god can beat up your sun god.

Mr. Tea
09-06-2009, 02:01 PM
it's all sun worship. seems silly to say my sun god can beat up your sun god.

I'm in England. It's fucking June. The sun god/dess round our way is being coyer than a bashful débutante. Grrr.

poetix
09-06-2009, 02:07 PM
Am I allowed the Pelagian one?

Of course!

I'm currently trying to understand why the Council of Nicea thought Arianism was such a big deal...

josef k.
09-06-2009, 04:17 PM
Also, the Austral B heretics.

A picture of their leader:

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/d/db/Thodin.jpg

Mr. Tea
09-06-2009, 04:33 PM
Also, the Austral B heretics.

A picture of their leader:

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/d/db/Thodin.jpg

Hubba HUBBA!

STN
09-06-2009, 04:35 PM
what's the name of that ancient heresy which denies the existence of The Hardcore Continuum? I'm sure they used to burn people for that, down The Labyrinth.

josef k.
09-06-2009, 04:58 PM
Hubba HUBBA!

Wikipedia states:


Thodin is the leader of the Austral-B Heretics, intent on the destruction of the Divine Order of the League of 20,000 planets and in particular, its ruler His Divine Shadow. He was a carrier of the "Key to the Lexx," which is an intelligent, living mass of symbiotic energy.

Thodin is armed with many special biotech gadgets, including a "bug bomb" hidden in his left nostril, and a false eyeball that explodes and makes him invisible. These tools come in handy during his adventures. The character wears a short pink skirt and high boots as symbols of authority and leadership.

He underwent a rigged trial at the Cluster Stadium on charges of piracy and murder. He escaped only to lose his life in a climactic battle with Kai. Immediately prior to that, he gave the "Key to the Lexx" to a subordinate who in turn was eaten by a cluster lizard in short order, at which point the Key went to Stanley Tweedle, who now captains the vessel.

He attempted to slow down the Divine Shadow's undead assassin Kai from stopping his subordinates flying off with the Lexx, but was ultimately killed by Kai despite chopping his head and arm off. His last words are cut short as he dies, "Today... I... Thodin..."

nomadthethird
09-06-2009, 05:30 PM
Beguines (http://www2.kenyon.edu/projects/margin/beguines.htm)

Slothrop
09-06-2009, 05:43 PM
Obscure protestant splinter:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Muggletonianism

padraig (u.s.)
09-06-2009, 05:48 PM
Reconstructionist Judaism (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reconstructionist_Judaism) - do you want to be a Jew but not a real Jew? this one's for you!! aka as the gateway to secularism.

Fraticelli (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fraticelli) - I remember reading about these dudes in In the Name of the Rose when I was like 12 & thinking, "awesome".

the Nation of Islam

I'm an equal opportunity heresy enthusiast. it's only heresy until you win (that should be a slogan, really).

nomadthethird
09-06-2009, 05:58 PM
Reconstructionist Judaism (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reconstructionist_Judaism) - do you want to be a Jew but not a real Jew? this one's for you!! aka as the gateway to secularism.


Aka every Jew I've ever known, lived with, or been related to... I had no idea this was heretical. If so there are a lot of heretics in NY.

padraig (u.s.)
09-06-2009, 06:12 PM
Aka every Jew I've ever known, lived with, or been related to... I had no idea this was heretical. If so there are a lot of heretics in NY.

that was satirical, in case it wasn't clear. my mom & stepdad have been going to a Reconstructionist synagogue for over 20 years. when I was about 10 my Orthodox dad informed me that they weren't actually Jews.

it's all about who you ask. Reconstructionist (& Reform & even, depending on which Orthodox dude you're talking, Conservative) Jews are considered heretics, or at least not real Jews, by most Orthodox. which is awesome, of course - the Jews, like we don't have enough problems. let's invent some more by being incredibly sectarian.

nomadthethird
09-06-2009, 06:15 PM
that was satirical, in case it wasn't clear. my mom & stepdad have been going to a Reconstructionist synagogue for over 20 years. when I was about 10 my Orthodox dad informed me that they weren't actually Jews.

it's all about who you ask. Reconstructionist (& Reform & even, depending on which Orthodox dude you're talking, Conservative) Jews are considered heretics, or at least not real Jews, by most Orthodox. which is awesome, of course - the Jews, like we don't have enough problems. let's invent some more by being incredibly sectarian.

Well, the most conservative Jews I can think of are Hasidim (who are anti-Israel weirdly enough), and they would not take me very seriously as a Jew I know that much.

Are you Russian by any chance?

josef k.
09-06-2009, 06:26 PM
I like the Judaism of: "If you ask two Jews, you get three opinions."

padraig (u.s.)
09-06-2009, 06:33 PM
Are you Russian by any chance?

lol nah. Irish Catholic on one side (mom's a convert) & the other uh, some kind of Eastern European - Lithuanian, maybe? - but in the States since the early 1900s.

my stepdad's family is Russian tho - he & all his siblings were born here but his grandfather was a petit bourgeois who was exiled to Siberia after the Revolution. his dad (so, my step-grandfather) has an awesome story about meeting Trotsky in like 1922 or something when Trotsky made a tour of his elementary school.

STN
09-06-2009, 07:15 PM
oooh, can we have followers of Shabbati Zevvi? that's my new favourite.

poetix
09-06-2009, 09:02 PM
Obscure protestant splinter:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Muggletonianism

V. influential on William Blake.

poetix
09-06-2009, 09:06 PM
Beguines sound awesome, like twelfth-century lesbian separatists.

Mr. Tea
10-06-2009, 12:56 AM
Muggletonianism just sounds too much like something from Harry Potter.

I dunno if they count as 'heretics' as such, but I'd like to add the Gozer worshippers led by Ivo Shandor, and the Starry Wisdom Sect.

nomadthethird
10-06-2009, 02:38 AM
Beguines sound awesome, like twelfth-century lesbian separatists.

It looks as if they've been reclaimed by feminists in the literature. Reading into it a little further, it also looks as if there were quite a number of them who had children or who strayed in from bad (abusive) marriages. I'm getting a "scarlet letter A" vibe (this is pre-pennyroyal tea, even), which might explain why they were accused of being prostitutes as well--where did these children come from if these women weren't married? This would have been a big deal I imagine. A perfect angle for the Church's smear campaign as well. (And to think this was only about 700 years before we developed more humane methods, such as asylums and "vacation" camps for unmarried pregnant women!)

I prefer imagining Beguines as fallen women who decided to redeem themselves by worshiping a God whose Church hated them, anyway, with guilt playing a dual role as a powerful vehicle for social constraint but also for social progress (or the prefiguration thereof).