Short Story Thread

bassbeyondreason

Chtonic Fatigue Syndrome
Share'em, fuckers, they don't need to be good:

He woke up with his kidneys intact but his memory gone. The light was filtered musty brown, with dust in the air. He coughed and sent a bolt of pain backwards, splitting rays through his head. He was stuck with dry sweat and could see only ceiling. There was throbbing in an empty head. His neck felt tight with muscle fatigue, his throat numb from the strain of regurtitation. With a burst of effort he flung himself up and away from the mattress, feet pounding onto the floor. The boards gave way. He gasped and hung.
 

Mr. Tea

Let's Talk About Ceps
I've got a few nice ones saved on my laptop, though sadly I can't take credit for them. Dammit, can't find them now, I'll post a couple up if I can dig them out.

I wrote a GCSE Science exam question, though...




Bill and Sanjay are riding their bicycles. Sanjay notices some rust spots on his bicycle, and complains that bicycles shouldn't be made of steel, as it contains iron which oxidises. Bill replies that bicycles should be made of gold instead, because it never oxidises.

Describe two suitable punishments for Bill for suggesting this.



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[2]
 

CHAOTROPIC

on account
It was a family pub & we were upstairs talking & talking & talking but things were bad. Our plan was wrecked. Too many people knew about it & anyway, we'd left too much of a trail. My laptop had pictures of the seahorse on it. We even had a book on seahorses to make sure we got the details right. It was a pretty stupid plan. What dumb fucks thought of this stupid plan. What dumb fucking fucks. Waves of shame & acid microbe insignificance & more shame. Couldn't we just pretend we'd lost the money, I said, but not aloud. What the fuck was all of this nonsense?

Made my decision walking back to the flat. It was ridiculous. The police would never buy it. It wouldn't work. They'd tear my flat apart & heaven knows what they'd find. The books on seahorses, for one. All those old 'Animals Of All Countries' with the red spines. The magazines & fridge magnets. Maybe stuff in my computer. (Old drugs stuffed down the jackets of books? So many books. How could I ever be sure?) & then they'd see our working & that's that. Figure out the whole plan. Figure out there was a plan. So, like I told my friend: sorry, but I'm not doing it. No way. It's not going to work, we'll get caught. I'm not sure I can lie like that to the police. You'll have to get your money elsewhere.

Said goodbye. Just walked away into the glittering crowd. Everyone was mindlessly, dementedly dressed up. Half-naked with dolls heads dangling off braces & bowlers, feather boas, bodypaint, lipstick, etc, super thugged-out black gangsters. & that's how I found myself walking with my new 'friends', slightly apprehensive, away from the rest of the group & into the shadow of a castle.

Who were these guys?

Where the fuck were they taking me?
 

baboon2004

Darned cockwombles.


Bill and Sanjay are riding their bicycles. Sanjay notices some rust spots on his bicycle, and complains that bicycles shouldn't be made of steel, as it contains iron which oxidises. Bill replies that bicycles should be made of gold instead, because it never oxidises.

Describe two suitable punishments for Bill for suggesting this.

[2]

Er, is 'stoning' one of the answers?
 

Mr. Tea

Let's Talk About Ceps
Er, is 'stoning' one of the answers?

Anything suitably harsh, so yeah, have a mark. :D

I like Chaotropic's story too, great example of hinting at stuff that's never explained, just left to fester and bear strange fruit in the reader's imagination.
 
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Not really related to the thread, but there was a thread a year or 2 ago where people shared their short story writing &/or blogs. There was this one really fucked up story about killing, and getting raped by swans, I'd love to read that story & blog again. Anyone remember who it was by?
 

swears

preppy-kei
Not really related to the thread, but there was a thread a year or 2 ago where people shared their short story writing &/or blogs. There was this one really fucked up story about killing, and getting raped by swans, I'd love to read that story & blog again. Anyone remember who it was by?

Oh... you mean Noah Baby Food? His stuff was really funny and well written, I can't find a link to his old blog with all the stories about macho action men killing women and babies, though.
 

Tentative Andy

I'm in the Meal Deal
Can you be bothered with full-length short stories (as it were) going in here, or would you prefer just flash fictions?
 

nomadthethird

more issues than Time mag
I've got a few nice ones saved on my laptop, though sadly I can't take credit for them. Dammit, can't find them now, I'll post a couple up if I can dig them out.

I wrote a GCSE Science exam question, though...




Bill and Sanjay are riding their bicycles. Sanjay notices some rust spots on his bicycle, and complains that bicycles shouldn't be made of steel, as it contains iron which oxidises. Bill replies that bicycles should be made of gold instead, because it never oxidises.

Describe two suitable punishments for Bill for suggesting this.



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[2]


HAHA gold is so soft...
 

nomadthethird

more issues than Time mag
Let's say cost wasn't a factor--still a horrible idea. I can just picture someone trying to smelt some gold into a bike...for a king. Or for Kim Jong Il.
 
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