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Thread: asexuality/celibacy

  1. #31
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mr. Tea View Post
    Aint nuttin like scratching yer armpit to Armpit Slutz 7...
    Man, I have seen this video but I can't find it.

    Fuck, when I track it down I will post a link in this thread.

  2. #32
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    Quote Originally Posted by slowtrain View Post
    I do that all the time.

    Do people really not do that?

    Just the same as like scratching yr armpit or rubbing your feet on the carpet to me
    for me for sure not. sexual imagery, in real time or not, is just as if not more important than the physical sensations.

  3. #33
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    I've heard the 'women like the physical sensation/men like sexual imagery' thing a load before. I think it's probably somehwhat accurate. At least to the extent that for men I'd imagine the feeling cannot be divorced from the imagery (used in the broadest sense). I wonder why that is. Wish the bold nomad was about to set us all straight.

  4. #34
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    Quote Originally Posted by slowtrain View Post
    Fuck, when I track it down I will post a link in this thread.
    The sad thing is, I bet it exists. Isn't that Rule #1 Of The Internet: "if you can think of it, there is porn of it"?
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  5. #35
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    No doubt there is some considerable correlation between the way men have used (and continue to use) women as status symbols that explains men's primary focus upon the visual. Whereas, in a historical sense, before any kind of labour equality, women have been encouraged to seek a good husband, meaning one who has resources, over looks.

    Obviously just broad trends, but can't help but have had a profound effect on men's deviation from what sex is in and of itself, to a more alienated view that incorporates the mind's eye of other men. but hell, a human history is a difficult thing to undo. and anyways, it's a whole lot more complicated than that, sex is always about a lot of stuff. but that's maybe a start.
    Last edited by baboon2004; 01-03-2012 at 02:13 PM.

  6. #36
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    Quote Originally Posted by baboon2004 View Post
    Whereas, in a historical sense, before any kind of labour equality, women have been encouraged to seek a good husband, meaning one who has resources, over looks.
    Looks and resources are not uncorrelated, though. A tall, well-built guy with good teeth, skin and so on can probably feed himself (and, by implication, any potential children) better than a scrawny, bow-legged runt with half his teeth missing.

    Of course this still applies, when you look at how much people of both sexes spend on clothes, gym membership, hair and skincare regimes, tooth-related products and the rest. And that's before we even start talking about cosmetic surgery. (OK, so some spray-tanned tart with fake knockers probably isn't your or my idea of hot, but nonetheless, people who spend at least some money on their appearance tend to look more attractive than people who pay no regard to it at all.)
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  7. #37
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    I agree that they're not completely uncorrelated in extreme cases and more to the point when people get older then skincare regimes/good living begin to tell more, but put two twentysomethings' faces together and it'd be next to impossible to tell who is the richer.

    Most men I have ever known/observed would at least be somewhat drawn towards an incredibly good looking girl with few career prospects over a plainish girl who has a good career*. Obviously there are extra problems once you start talking about this stuff, but my point is just that men use women's pulchritude to bolster their status, and so that this has taken on a sexual aspect whereby imagery turns a man on is unsurprising.

    Obv definitively proving the argument I put forward would be very tricky, but it would seem to me a good starting point towards explaining what people have observed re men and women's sexual behaviours.

    Edit: I'd say the point about 'beauty regimes' is very interesting though, but think it's slightly different. To me it's a natural extension of making money out of people's insecurities - telling them they need stuff they never knew they wanted, creating new markets etc. Obviously this has been going on with women for ages (and what are most women's magazines but continuous advertorials?), but with men there must've been an exploding market in this type of thing over the past decade. I blame Men's Health magazine.



    Quote Originally Posted by Mr. Tea View Post
    Looks and resources are not uncorrelated, though. A tall, well-built guy with good teeth, skin and so on can probably feed himself (and, by implication, any potential children) better than a scrawny, bow-legged runt with half his teeth missing.

    Of course this still applies, when you look at how much people of both sexes spend on clothes, gym membership, hair and skincare regimes, tooth-related products and the rest. And that's before we even start talking about cosmetic surgery. (OK, so some spray-tanned tart with fake knockers probably isn't your or my idea of hot, but nonetheless, people who spend at least some money on their appearance tend to look more attractive than people who pay no regard to it at all.)
    Last edited by baboon2004; 01-03-2012 at 03:50 PM.

  8. #38
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    Quote Originally Posted by baboon2004 View Post
    I agree that they're not completely uncorrelated in extreme cases and more to the point when people get older then skincare regimes/good living begin to tell more, but put two twentysomethings' faces together and it'd be next to impossible to tell who is the richer.
    Hmm, you're probably right about it being more important as you get older but I reckon it would probably show even with young people. Ignoring cultural signifiers like hair style, there's still the effect of diet on hair and skin.

    And even in terms of facial structure, I reckon there's an identifiable caste of posh people in this country. I see them in west London when I catch the coach to Oxford and they're all over Oxford too, of course. It's hard to describe but there is a certain look that's not just to do with clothes and hair.

    Quote Originally Posted by baboon2004 View Post
    Most men I have ever known/observed would at least be somewhat drawn towards an incredibly good looking girl with few career prospects over a plainish girl who has a good career*.
    Thing is though, being incredibly good looking is a career prospect in itself, especially for women.

    Quote Originally Posted by baboon2004 View Post
    Edit: I'd say the point about 'beauty regimes' is very interesting though, but think it's slightly different. To me it's a natural extension of making money out of people's insecurities - telling them they need stuff they never knew they wanted, creating new markets etc. Obviously this has been going on with women for ages (and what are most women's magazines but continuous advertorials?), but with men there must've been an exploding market in this type of thing over the past decade. I blame Men's Health magazine.
    Yeah, for sure. There are cultures where both men and women, or in some cases men moreso than women, go to extremes to conform with that culture's standard of beauty (what's that ethnic group on Africa that has a tradition of male beauty contests judged by women?). And there are places where the things people do to themselves to be 'beautiful' make boob jobs look pretty tame - those women with horribly distended necks held up by dozens of metal rings, foot binding in China, ritual scarification in parts of Africa - I guess the difference is that things like that are low-tech and 'home made', to some extent, whereas it's an enormous industry in the developed world. As well as parts of the developing world - you know how massive skin-lightening creams are in India, right? You can get them in chemists in London, too.
    Last edited by Mr. Tea; 04-03-2012 at 10:38 PM.
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  9. #39
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mr. Tea View Post
    And even in terms of facial structure, I reckon there's an identifiable caste of posh people in this country. I see them in west London when I catch the coach to Oxford and they're all over Oxford too, of course. It's hard to describe but there is a certain look that's not just to do with clothes and hair.
    yes - 'horsey'. Too much inbreeding.

  10. #40
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mr. Tea View Post
    The sad thing is, I bet it exists. Isn't that Rule #1 Of The Internet: "if you can think of it, there is porn of it"?
    Oh it does and it is amazing.

    I can only find wimpy japanese stuff though.

  11. #41
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    Quote Originally Posted by baboon2004 View Post
    yes - 'horsey'. Too much inbreeding.
    Could well have something to do with it. Nobility is incestuous the world over.
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  12. #42
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    we are a generation raised with sexualized imagery and pornography basically everywhere. i think confusing, and not making a distinction between, representations/simulations and reality is second nature to many of us, and maybe even more so with the younger ones. the effects of this undifferentiation is i'm sure myriad and very significant... psychologically, behaviorally, socially, etc. effects which i'm sure will not become apparent until a later date when future anthropologists can properly analyze us and this period of social history.

    it's incredible and shocking. i sometimes find myself getting a little aroused by a tiny 30X30 pixel avatar.

  13. #43
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    Quote Originally Posted by zhao View Post
    we are a generation raised with sexualized imagery and pornography basically everywhere. i think confusing, and not making a distinction between, representations/simulations and reality is second nature to many of us, and maybe even more so with the younger ones. the effects of this undifferentiation is i'm sure myriad and very significant... psychologically, behaviorally, socially, etc. effects which i'm sure will not become apparent until a later date when future anthropologists can properly analyze us and this period of social history.

    it's incredible and shocking. i sometimes find myself getting a little aroused by a tiny 30X30 pixel avatar.
    i'm glad i was a teenager in the 90s rather than the 2000s if i'm honest - while i love the internet, glad it wasn't available to me until a bit later...

  14. #44
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    Quote Originally Posted by baboon2004 View Post
    i'm glad i was a teenager in the 90s rather than the 2000s if i'm honest - while i love the internet, glad it wasn't available to me until a bit later...
    yes. but even with us... maybe this is too personal but a shit i give not: my first sexual experiences were with magazines. and it was many years before i did it with a real girl. i don't know about other people, but i have a feeling that there are many, if not most, who developed like this.

    it is profoundly unnatural if you think about it. (theory types get the fuck outta here with that "nature doesn't exist" shit)

  15. #45
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    similar, but the combination of going thru puberty and an internet filled to the rafters with porn - complete headfuck, though I guess for anyone born in the mid-80s or later it's jsut how it is.

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