luka

Well-known member
It probably is the best 100 ever made. I hate some of it, the yacht facism, Abba and the italian schlock, but as a whole, an aesthetic and an argument it's hard to beat. Mine would be much less interesting. In fact it's so boring I bored myself after about 3 entries when I tried it.
 

Leo

Well-known member
love how, aside from a blip part way through, this thread has also brought a positive spirit to the forum, everyone happy and working together to help one another. it's almost a little nauseating but GOOD!
 

sadmanbarty

Well-known member
craner is not a man of extremities.

a centrist, not just politically, but in temperament. no bouts of serene tranquility nor ones of outright aggression.

we see a man yearning for the everyday-idyl. he has no desire to be a cosmonaut or a revolutionary. he enjoys the chic of the real world. clothes, conversation, sex, romance, maybe a boat one day. but he is not dull. he catalyses the richness of the attainable and he enriches all our lives.

he is the profundity of walking under street lights on lonely city streets in the early hours. of marveling at a beautiful woman's physique as it caressed by gentle spring sunlight. he is the telling of nostalgic tales by a crackling fire. the wistfulness of remembering lovers lost.

he is all our lives at their most aspirational and most beautiful.
 

luka

Well-known member
craner is not a man of extremities.

a centrist, not just politically, but in temperament. no bouts of serene tranquility nor ones of outright aggression.

we see a man yearning for the everyday-idyl. he has no desire to be a cosmonaut or a revolutionary. he enjoys the chic of the real world. clothes, conversation, sex, romance, maybe a boat one day. but he is not dull. he catalyses the richness of the attainable and he enriches all our lives.

he is the profundity of walking under street lights on lonely city streets in the early hours. of marveling at a beautiful woman's physique as it caressed by gentle spring sunlight. he is the telling of nostalgic tales by a crackling fire. the wistfulness of remembering lovers lost.

he is all our lives at their most aspirational and most beautiful.

Savouring a nice plate of pasta and a glass of good red wine, perhaps a small side salad. A paperback novel read on the beach in summer. A few days in a nice part of Italy or France. An article or short story in The New Yorker magazine. An indulgent afternoon visit to the cinema alone.
 

version

Well-known member
Notes on Craner's Top 100.

a guy called oliver, a wonderful selection by a wonderful man, an awful selection by an awful man, an awful tag by an anonymous arse, an oliver supreme, apotheosis of maria, babe it's ok, balls of woe, blimey, call him mr raider call him mr crane, citizen's advice, coltrane's crescent, craner hunting season, craner vs. woebot, craner's a nonce, craner's chode, cranes fly with necks outstretched, cranes in the sky, cranonical, erotic joy, fat jim, free version, he's not fat... anymore, jovial jim, julian assange, momentous, please come back, shagging, slim jim, tafkaj, the artist formally known as fat jim, the crane, the craner spring, the resurrection of craner, the soul crane, version is an anonymous arse, version is awful, version was not the culprit, version's knob dissapears like his posts, versions got a microwinky, welsh secret technology, what's up doc?, yacht fascism...
 

thirdform

pass the sick bucket
craner is not a man of extremities.

a centrist, not just politically, but in temperament. no bouts of serene tranquility nor ones of outright aggression.

we see a man yearning for the everyday-idyl. he has no desire to be a cosmonaut or a revolutionary. he enjoys the chic of the real world. clothes, conversation, sex, romance, maybe a boat one day. but he is not dull. he catalyses the richness of the attainable and he enriches all our lives.

he is the profundity of walking under street lights on lonely city streets in the early hours. of marveling at a beautiful woman's physique as it caressed by gentle spring sunlight. he is the telling of nostalgic tales by a crackling fire. the wistfulness of remembering lovers lost.

he is all our lives at their most aspirational and most beautiful.


incontrovertible fucking evidence that Ollie is your dad. get to writing his biography. it will win a nobel prize.

I'll even hold that loathsome cunt Orhan Pamuk at gunpoint to endorse it, even though the cunt shares a name with me.
 

sadmanbarty

Well-known member
craner is those nights you wish would never end.

your favourite christmas from your childhood

that one perfect kiss alone by the sea under the moonlight

the squeeze of a hand to let you know they're there for you.

that perfect, road trip with your best friends listening to music as the wind rushes through your outstretched fingers.

the setting Mediterranean sunset
 

thirdform

pass the sick bucket
craner is those nights you wish would never end.

your favourite christmas from your childhood

that one perfect kiss alone by the sea under the moonlight

the squeeze of a hand to let you know they're there for you.

that perfect, road trip with your best friends listening to music as the wind rushes through your outstretched fingers.

the setting Mediterranean sunset

Alright now you've turned into Louise Mensch. Sort it out. Is Geri Halliwell ur mum?
 

luka

Well-known member
The miles rolling away as you go for a long drive up the coast or along winding country roads. The feeling of emerging invigorated and alive after a swim in the sea, rewarding yourself with a liqueur chocolate after a long, trying day at work. It's one model of the good life. A powerful and serious argument.
 

sadmanbarty

Well-known member
Savouring a nice plate of pasta and a glass of good red wine, perhaps a small side salad. A paperback novel read on the beach in summer. A few days in a nice part of Italy or France. An article or short story in The New Yorker magazine. An indulgent afternoon visit to the cinema alone.

NO!

can you lot please listen to 'if you were here tonight' and reminisce about your lives.

oliver craner is not a joke to make snarky comments about. he is salvation.
 

thirdform

pass the sick bucket
soft new age porn music playing in the background. gloria leonard and catherine hepburn's sex tape lps on the turntable. bliss.
 

luka

Well-known member
NO!

can you lot please listen to 'if you were here tonight' and reminisce about your lives.

oliver craner is not a joke to make snarky comments about. he is salvation.

What do you mean no? It's not a joke or snark. It's a serious model of the good life. One you might end up feeling the pull of. As you say, it's the attainable middle class idyll.
 

sadmanbarty

Well-known member
no, no, no.

it's not about material things. on the surface maybe, but not at it's core. that's what the list has taught me. i thought he was bryan ferry, but he's actually buddha.
 
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