films you've seen recently and would NOT recommend

**Mr. Tea** · 11-03-2007, 10:02 PM

Originally Posted by alo

Yeah, you can almost here the whole of the British film Industry willing it on. I have to admit that i haven't seen it, but thats because it looks shit.
A ! Ha Ha! Hilarious! Well done boys.
A really tired idea at best.

I suppose it is rather a latecomer to the whole Hollywood-action-cop-thriller-set-in-a-West-Country-village genre...

Why don't you watch it and decide for yourself? You might be surprised.

**alo** · 12-03-2007, 09:57 PM

I suppose it is rather a latecomer to the whole Hollywood-action-cop-thriller-set-in-a-West-Country-village genre...

I suppose it is rather a latecomer to the whole British-TV-comedy-writer-goes-Hollywood-and-ends-up-looking-a-bit-of-a-nob genre...

**shudder** · 13-03-2007, 04:18 AM

See the thread on the execrable 300.

**Mr. Tea** · 13-03-2007, 12:41 PM

Originally Posted by alo

I suppose it is rather a latecomer to the whole British-TV-comedy-writer-goes-Hollywood-and-ends-up-looking-a-bit-of-a-nob genre...

Well I liked it, so ner.

/well-argued, reasoned debate

**gabriel** · 22-03-2007, 08:54 AM

babel

fucking hell, what a waste of my time

**IdleRich** · 22-03-2007, 10:24 AM

I think that someone on here mentioned this before but I can't find it, anyway I watched Art School Confidential the other day and it was a complete and utter mess. At the end I had no idea what they were trying to do with it and I don't think that they did either. It started off with a few clunky shots at obvious targets (art-school students) which were mildly amusing (I liked the bare-foot girl arriving at school only to tread on some broken glass) and I settled in for what appeared to be a not especially good but watchable comedy. Then it went totally wrong, they were obviously trying to inject some kind of depth and meaning but they completely failed and all of the subplots were both boring and stupid, a real waste of a couple of hours (and it was particularly galling that to get it out I had to pay the FIFTY-TWO POUND FIFTY fine that my girlfriend had run up on the last film she forgot to take back).
Much better but also something I wouldn't necessarily recommend was the Apu trilogy which I watched this week. It's obviously brilliant but I found it very depressing at times, particularly every single second of the second movie.
SPOILER
It tells a tale of a (once wealthy?) family living in grinding poverty, their lives made bearable by the spirit of the mother and the liveliness of Durka, the daughter. By the end of the first film both an elderly relative and Durka have died and Apu has reached about eight years old. It finishes with them heading off to try and start a new life in the city.
The second film begins with them finally having established themselves and looking as though the weak but lovely father may be able to earn enough money as a priest. Sadly it doesn't last and he is soon carried off by disease. Apu's mother works hard and scrapes to save for him and manages to put him through school where he triumphantly wins a scholarship. Reluctantly his mother allows him to head off to Calcutta and the scenes of his happiness at his freedom and her sadness are really heartbreaking. Finally she becomes ill and dies with Apu arriving home just too late to comfort her.
I watched the third film last night safe in the knowledge that his whole family were dead and surely no more misery could be heaped on him (and me) but I reckoned without a marriage to a young and beautiful girl which lasts just long enough for you to revel in their happiness before the curse of Apu in the form of childbirth sends her off to join the rest of his family. By this point I'd just about given up the will to live.
Basically, it's fantastic and looks great and everything but I kind of wish I hadn't watched it.

**mms** · 28-10-2007, 11:54 AM

i saw harmony korines new film mr lonely at the london film festival and it was shockingly awful in every single way, pretentious. just terrible, it was part funded by agnes b and all her cronies were there guffawing away, it was pathetic. i was disappointed as i liked gummo etc,

**mistersloane** · 29-10-2007, 07:20 AM

Flood. Don't go there.
Saw IV. Don't go there.
TMNT. Don't go there.
Resident Evil 3. Don't go there.

**crackerjack** · 29-10-2007, 09:29 AM

Originally Posted by mistersloane

Flood. Don't go there.
Saw IV. Don't go there.
TMNT. Don't go there.
Resident Evil 3. Don't go there.

trip to the cinema with mistersloane. don't go there

Either you're in the biz, have wonky tastes or are way too indulgent of mates with wonky taste

**Mr. Tea** · 29-10-2007, 12:44 PM

Originally Posted by mistersloane

Flood. Don't go there.
Saw IV. Don't go there.
TMNT. Don't go there.
Resident Evil 3. Don't go there.

Blimey, that's awful. What happened? If you want to talk about it, I'm here.

**Sick Boy** · 29-10-2007, 04:42 PM

Waking Life.

Poorly-conceived, ostentatious trash which has the apparent main purpose of stroking the egos of misguided university students who have just taken their first philosophy course and now "get it."

Seriously this movie is basically a visual representation of the kind of conversations people have before they make a movie. That is not a good thing.

**tox** · 30-10-2007, 08:54 PM

Originally Posted by Sick Boy

Waking Life.

Poorly-conceived, ostentatious trash which has the apparent main purpose of stroking the egos of misguided university students who have just taken their first philosophy course and now "get it."

Seriously this movie is basically a visual representation of the kind of conversations people have before they make a movie. That is not a good thing.

It looks nice though doesn't it? I remember thinking it all very clever when I was a little year eleven when it came out. Watched it back when I was in sixth form and cringed. Eurgh.

I maintain that there are very few films I regret seeing. Most films have at least one redeeming feature and it would take a great steaming shite of a movie for me to rather spend my 90minutes elsewhere.

The only thing that falls into that totally crap category that I've seen recently is Run Fat Boy Run. Awful. Even worse than Love Actually.

**crackerjack** · 19-01-2008, 05:23 PM

The Cottage.

Blatant stab at comedy horror a la Shaun of the Dead (which I liked) by the director of London to Brighton (which i liked). Reece Shearsmith (off League of gentlemen) is so irritating he should've been slashed in the 1st 5 mins and Jennifer Ellison's line in potty-mouthed aggression gets really boring.

Muddled and terrifically unfunny (though I did like the bit where psycho ripped someone's head off via the spinal cord)

**jonny mugwump** · 19-01-2008, 05:45 PM

Waking Life totally dire- walked out (a rarity for me) after 20 mins for exactly the reason stated above- pseudo philosophical nonsense.

which is why i ws totally blown away shocked by the quality of Scanner Darkly- if waking life was necessary to produce that then i guess i'm happy. As long as i dont actually have to see it.

Who's that guy- Dogma- Von Trier, right?

What a miserable self-indulgent miserable egotistical miserable lunatic. I have just about forgiven Bjork for even talking to him, never minding appearing in one of his hellish pain-fests.
Festen was the only decent movie from that 'movement'