Pointless But It Does My Head In

Mr. Tea

Mr. Tea

Let's Talk About Ceps
Pub/club/bar (gent's) toilets: there are two urinals, or maybe a short trough if it's a proper old pub, and one or two cubicles.

You're using one urinal, and some guy walks in and makes a point of using the cubicle even though he only needs a piss, because he's worried that standing next to you other than when absolutely necessary could give the impression that he wants to bum you. Better safe than sorry, I guess.

Also, blokes who use the cubical for a piss and close, but do not lock, the door. Leaving you to push it open, find it in use, and feel compelled to mumble a semi-audible apology as if *you've* been the one who's committed some gross faux pas. :mad:

I guess some people just don't know how to use toilets properly.
 
Mr. Tea

Mr. Tea

Let's Talk About Ceps
john eden said:
I think sometimes people use the cubicle cos they get stage fright tho.

Or need to take drugs.
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Ahh, well drugs I can understand - I'm talking about genuinely unnecessary cubicle use to avoid the (I imagine) crippling awkwardness of standing next to another bloke while pissing. Then again, you've got the drunk guy (whom you don't know) who feels the need to engage in manly banter while you're both venting, which goes just a bit too far the other way.
 
john eden

john eden

male pale and stale
Mr. Tea said:
Ahh, well drugs I can understand - I'm talking about genuinely unnecessary cubicle use to avoid the (I imagine) crippling awkwardness of standing next to another bloke while pissing. Then again, you've got the drunk guy (whom you don't know) who feels the need to engage in manly banter while you're both venting, which goes just a bit too far the other way.
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People try to talk to me while I'm using the urinal here at work sometimes, that is bang out of order.
 
Mr. Tea

Mr. Tea

Let's Talk About Ceps
john eden said:
People try to talk to me while I'm using the urinal here at work sometimes, that is bang out of order.
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Did you know the Romans had communal latrines with no partitions or anything? Probably not the posh ones, but soldiers did, anyway. "Awright, Marius? Bit noisy this morning, if you don't mind me saying, heh heh..." "Yeah, couple of dodgy dormice last night, I reckon". :rolleyes:
 
Mr. Tea

Mr. Tea

Let's Talk About Ceps
STN said:
by which time, more often than not, you've already got your cock out.
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And if you've already achieved a decent erection and applied a johnny and lube, it almost seems a shame to waste it.






I should imagine.
 
Z

zhao

there are no accidents
hay_guys_whats_going_on.jpg
 
Jaie Miller

Jaie Miller

Well-known member
I had no idea I was refusing your invite Mr.Tea. Jeeesus!!! :p

Offended because i did not pee next to you...

sometimes i need to be alone, and you're not helping me clear my head...staring down on my penis, you know you're doing it. damn.

i don't know what to say.

sometimes i go in the cubicle just to breakdown. nothing to do with peeing.

four guys in a row peeing, urine ricocheting every which way...if that's what you call flush!!!

gosh....only my best andy warhol impression can handle this Mr.Tea.
 
fokse vektaire xeven

fokse vektaire xeven

Arab Nazi
PAUSE.


This is clearly a minefield but the civilised question has to be why you WOULD want to stand beside a urinating stranger rather than why you wouldn't. i'm admitting to cubicle use...
 
Mr. Tea

Mr. Tea

Let's Talk About Ceps
fokse vektaire xeven said:
PAUSE.


This is clearly a minefield but the civilised question has to be why you WOULD want to stand beside a urinating stranger rather than why you wouldn't. i'm admitting to cubicle use...
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Haha, what's this 'pause' thing? The other guy also likes "the trade", which seems pretty dodgy.

I just think it's odd that you'd use the cubicle when there's a urinal free (but other urinals are in use) even though you'd obviously use a urinal when they're all free.

Of course, if you're a certified pisswimp (someone who has trouble weeing in front of others, or gets 'stage fright' as Eden puts it) that's understandable. Although you're still a pisswimp, and therefore deserve mockery and scorn.
 
Mr. Tea

Mr. Tea

Let's Talk About Ceps
Something else that does my head in: use of the word 'zen' as an adjective, to mean "chilled out". :mad:
 
Amplesamples

Amplesamples

Well-known member
Tube chat

Another thing that does my head in:

On the tube in London today, I was on the escalator, walking down the left-hand side (as is the required protocol) when someone else on the right hand side further down, moved from the right hand side to the left hand side to stand in the same place and HAVE A CHAT WITH HER MATE!

This meant I had to stop and wait for them to get back to the correct side before I could continue.
 
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Mr. Tea

Mr. Tea

Let's Talk About Ceps
Amplesamples said:
Another thing that does my head in:

On the tube in London today, I was on the escalator, walking down the left-hand side (as is the required protocol) when someone else on the right hand side further down, moved from the right hand side to the left hand side to stand in the same place and HAVE A CHAT WITH HER MATE!

This meant I had to stop and wait for them to get back to the correct side before I could continue.
Click to expand...

I'd love it if it were legal to just throw people who do this out of the way or, if that doesn't work, blow them away with UZIs.

***Please note: this post may have been influenced by fond memories of Total Recall***
 
swears

swears

preppy-kei
I will sometimes go in the cubicle to wee if there's one of those metal troughs and it's full to the brim and ready to splash back all over me. Otherwise, a urinal is fine.

That is all.
 
Mr. Tea

Mr. Tea

Let's Talk About Ceps
The drunk cow singing 'Living On A Prayer' at ear-splitting volume outside my bedroom window at fuck-knows o'clock last night. :mad:

The half-dozen or so Bangladeshi rudeboys who seem to spend most of their lives perched on the little wall on the opposite side of the road, conversing by yelling in each other's faces, and were doing so at 5am. double-:mad:

The worst thing about living in Bow is how sodding noisy it can be at night, especially in summer when it's nice to sleep with the window open. *grumble grumble*
 
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Mr. Tea

Mr. Tea

Let's Talk About Ceps
Fucking Banksy. :mad:

Ooh look, a policeman taking drugs! Genius! Which is, like, *such* a headfuck, because it's actually the policeman's job to ARREST people who take drugs! OMFG, that's the cleverest, most dangerously subversive thing I've seen in all my born days! Legend!
 
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