Page 1 of 5 123 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 15 of 61

Thread: PE teachers = CUNTS

  1. #1

    Default PE teachers = CUNTS

    Aren't they just the lowest form of life? Braindead beery army rejects.

    We had one who liked Northern Soul, which is why I think Northern Soul is shit and only wankers listen to it. He used to lock me and a couple of cronies in the music room (a boiler room) and make us write pointless essays, like "Why I think the Winter Olympics is important" as a punishment for drifting off the pitch during the tedious 25-a-side football matches. The cunt also once bounced a football off my head because I had better things to do than listen to his Graham Taylor impersonations.

    We had one in primary school who was later outed as a paedophile, the sadistic piece of filth used to pull kids' shorts down and spank them with a plastic cricket bat. Turns out later he was also filming it on a Betamax camera.

    The scumbag in "Kes" was way, way too sympathetic. How cuntish were yours?
    Last edited by martin; 06-02-2008 at 12:43 PM.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Merseyside
    Posts
    3,546

    Default

    We had one who would go around making sure we'd all had a proper shower.

    His catchphrase was "Let's see those willies waggling!"

    I just used to bunk off games and read old sci-fi novels in the library, nobody seemed to notice.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Posts
    2,524

    Default

    Mine weren't too bad comparatively; mid-nineties, school in Richmond with posh parents ready to kick up a fuss, but they were still a diabolical bunch of vest-and-pants merchants.

    My best mate once got bollocked by my mum because we were about 17 and she was giving us a lift somewhere when we spied an old PE teacher from our school who my best mate greeted by opening the window, shrieking said teacher's nickname ('shitthickballbag') and flinging a milkshake at him. It was well worth it.

  4. #4

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by swears View Post
    His catchphrase was "Let's see those willies waggling!"
    See what I mean? Everyone's going apeshit over Maddie but they ignore the menace lurking behind the local school gates..!

  5. #5

    Default

    Yeah we had one who used to check everyone had dried themselves properly after swimming....

    Also one who used to just lose it, screaming in redfaced rage at 7-10 year old kids, i remember him lifting a kid up by his ears once. is that even possible? i suppose he just pulled them hard.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    7,599

    Default

    One time I forgot my kit and he made me do cross country running in these plimsoles (is that how you spell it?) that were way too small and when I came back my big toes were completely black under the nail with dried blood. I had bruises for weeks and then the nails fell off.
    A few years later we were doing cricket nets and he got hit right in the face by the ball going really hard. Ha ha.

  7. #7

    Default

    proudest school moment: telling a cunt of a pe teacher I didn't like his attitude.

  8. #8

    Default

    ah now that could be a good thread, times you told it like it really was to a teacher.

    i almost feel guilty about things i said to some teachers but they did need to hear it.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    Somerset
    Posts
    851

    Default

    [QUOTE=martin;125356]Aren't they just the lowest form of life? Braindead beery army rejects.

    We had one who liked Northern Soul, which is why I think Northern Soul is shit and only wankers listen to it. He used to lock me and a couple of cronies in the music room (a boiler room) and make us write pointless essays, like "Why I think the Winter Olympics is important"

    I had a cunt of a PE teacher that made me write an essay titled "Why is the key you need always the last one on your ring you try?". Cunt.

    I did have one cool one though. Mr Hazel. He was an ex-boxer and word around the school was that he had to carry a baseball bat in his car to use in explosive situations because if he used his fists **it would be just too dangerous**.

    He spoke in a barely understandable muffled grunt and had a face like a sprout. I suspect he was too brain-damaged to be a cunt.

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Posts
    14,828

    Default

    I can't remember any really awful ones - just run-of-the-mill incompetence with a certain amount of low-grade sadism here and there. I think I felt more sorry for most of them than anything else.
    Doin' the Lambeth Warp New: DISSENSUS - THE NOVEL - PM me your email address and I'll add you

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Posts
    5,524

    Default

    I had 3 PE teachers at secondary school and all of them hit me at least once: one for turning up to cross country with a sick note (god knows how a games teacher knew it was my writing); one for remarking that it was a bit chilly in the mid-winter ("Warm you up than shall i, sunshine". thwack! ha fucking ha). The other one really hated me.

  12. #12
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Posts
    5,524

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by sodiumnightlife View Post
    proudest school moment: telling a cunt of a pe teacher I didn't like his attitude.
    One stand-in PE teacher (think he was usually english with a bit of remedial thrown in) threatened to hit me. I mumbled soomething about rights and complaints and he told me to make sure I spelt his name right when i took him to court. No problem, i said - b-a-s-t-a-r-d. Oddly he apoogised to me the following day (he wasn't a real PE teacher, see).

  13. #13
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Posts
    2,524

    Default

    I didn't WANT to be rubbish at sport, I just was and I don't see what use there was getting cross about it.

    Ours used to make us get changed in 3 minutes flat or we had to do it again ad infinitum, occasionally outside.

  14. #14
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Posts
    5,524

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Edward View Post
    Yeah we had one who used to check everyone had dried themselves properly after swimming....

    Also one who used to just lose it, screaming in redfaced rage at 7-10 year old kids, i remember him lifting a kid up by his ears once. is that even possible? i suppose he just pulled them hard.
    Oh definitely no paedos among ours - that was the cub master.

  15. #15
    Join Date
    Oct 2004
    Location
    Manchester
    Posts
    588

    Default

    one didn't allow underpants in his lesson-used to check by putting his hand down the front of your shorts!!!
    forgot your trainers-had to do cross country in your Doc's (not too bad)
    HOWEVER in the fourth & fith year one of the P.E. options became Darts and Pool (it was Wigan)

Tags for this Thread

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •