Actioning a blue-skies approach outside the box

sufi

sufi

lala
deliverables

well yes,
a lot of this bullshit is necessitated by the fact that so much of what modern services are concerned with providing is intangible - cloudy vapourware, that's why we seem to still need to talk about workshops, files, tools, and so on, although actually it's all just data
 
Slothrop

Slothrop

Tight but Polite
Well, I think "business speak" is a mix of two things. Firstly the fact that if you're trying to understand and talk about a bunch of fairly complicated and abstract things using a language that was originally developed to tell the other monkeys where the really ripe fruit is[1] then you're probably going to have to extend the basic vocabulary a bit and introduce new terms for specific, well-defined concepts, just like everyone from dance music nerds to quantum physicists does[2]. And secondly the use of language as a cultural shibboleth to demonstrate to everyone who's listening that you're a proper business person who's part of serious business culture and hence are to be taken seriously. Which again is probably the same thing you get with any subculture, although it's a lot more annoying with corporate talk.




[1] paraphrase from Pratchett
[2] Physics buzzwords thread: "lol, electroweak force, what's that all about? They're just making stuff up to sound like they're doing something clever."
 
Mr. Tea

Mr. Tea

Let's Talk About Ceps
Apparently webinars just aren't cutting it any more - a friend of mine has been inviting to a FUNNINAR!

Funning hell. :eek:
 
Slothrop

Slothrop

Tight but Polite
This is glorious:
http://welcometobusinesstown.tumblr.com/

tumblr_nieljovP8I1u1hvc9o1_500.jpg
 
Mr. Tea

Mr. Tea

Let's Talk About Ceps
At what point did people stop merely living in places and start being "based" in them?

I'm getting this on a daily basis from recruiters. Each and every one says "Where are you based?", like I'm a multinational corporation or a major football team or something.
 
B

baboon2004

Darned cockwombles.
Continuing the theme of simple words being made obsolete 'in a business context', since when did the word 'read' become insufficient?

"I'm just going to review this email" etc
 
L

Lichen

Well-known member
From a "paper" I am re-writing for a management consultancy today:

We hypothesise that the power of developing (and then living) the organisational Purpose is its galvanising force in rallying employees around a central idea. The very act of development can drive an organisation down the road towards a shared sense of motivation for the work each person contributes on a daily basis – influencing leaders and other employees to take stock of their job-related goals, processes and communication, and in some cases their wider ‘reasons to be’ as individuals.
 
Mr. Tea

Mr. Tea

Let's Talk About Ceps
Fuck me, that's like Orwell took a huge shit after devouring Waterstones' entire Self-Help section.
 
john eden

john eden

male pale and stale
Bullshit language in my workplace has largely evapourated since we got a new boss and shed about 50% of the workforce. Maybe people just can't hide behind it now, or maybe they simply don't have time to sit about coming up with this nonsense.
 
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