Page 1 of 17 12311 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 15 of 250

Thread: Actioning a blue-skies approach outside the box

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Posts
    15,825

    Default Actioning a blue-skies approach outside the box

    I'd like to touch base with yourselves about incentivising challenges as we go forward. But first, I want a client-oriented feedback package on exactly why this sort of management-speak is so spleen-rupturingly abhorrent to anyone who isn't a contemptible turd of a human being. Thoughts? Feelings? Idea showers?

    Some great examples here: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/magazine/7457287.stm

    Now let's leverage some throughput, people!
    Last edited by Mr. Tea; 17-01-2011 at 10:03 AM.
    Doin' the Lambeth Warp New: DISSENSUS - THE NOVEL - PM me your email address and I'll add you

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    London
    Posts
    535

    Default

    The ones I encounter and hate the most are 'touch base' and 'cascade'.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Posts
    78

    Default

    God I hate that crap!

    It's infected the world of education too. The one I hate the most I think is 'parachute teams'. Also 'going forward' is a bugbear. Which other way would you go?

    Kind of on the same topic, but a little different is when customer services use the word "yourself" rather than you ie "we'll send that direct debit form to yourself to sign and send back". It's supposed to sound clever, but it sounds incredibly thick.
    "Now pause the movie cause what I'm about to say to y'all is so damn twisted, not only is there a man in his cabinet, but the man is a midget! MIDGET! MIDGET! MIDGET!"

    amplesamples.wordpress.com

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Oct 2004
    Posts
    8,414

    Default

    Pet hates:

    'drilling down' into a topic;

    "I'd like to have a meeting around the idea of...". Wtf? 'Around?' Is 'about' just too direct and not redolent enough of bullshit?


    All-time worst name for a seminar: "Finding a path through the ideas swamp".

    Round them up, and shoot them.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Posts
    15,825

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Amplesamples View Post
    Also 'going forward' is a bugbear. Which other way would you go?
    Down the pub, if anyone tried that shit on me, I think.

    Quote Originally Posted by Amplesamples View Post
    Kind of on the same topic, but a little different is when customer services use the word "yourself" rather than you ie "we'll send that direct debit form to yourself to sign and send back". It's supposed to sound clever, but it sounds incredibly thick.
    Heh, yeah, 'hypercorrection' - not the first time I've read or written rants about this on Dissensus. It's somehow far worse than common-or-garden grammatical laziness, I think.

    Also, what the cock is a 'parachute team'?
    Doin' the Lambeth Warp New: DISSENSUS - THE NOVEL - PM me your email address and I'll add you

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Oct 2004
    Location
    North East London
    Posts
    5,795

    Default

    "we need more granularity" was a good one.

    I.e. we need more detail.

    I wonder, is all the buzz word stuff just a way of pretending that you are hip when the actual job is the same old boring shite?

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Oct 2004
    Location
    North East London
    Posts
    5,795

    Default

    I think language is quite powerful so I wonder what the agenda here is, I mean.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Posts
    2,145

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by baboon2004 View Post
    All-time worst name for a seminar: "Finding a path through the ideas swamp".

    Round them up, and shoot them.
    or just hope that they don't find a path, and end up drowning in the ideas swamp? maybe get eaten by the brainstorm crocodiles?

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Posts
    2,145

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by john eden View Post
    I think language is quite powerful so I wonder what the agenda here is, I mean.
    good question. it's fair to say that the prevalance of management consultants and management speak has emerged in the last 20 years, right? surely there can't be a genuine belief in those circles that talking like that increases productivity (and therefore profit). you could probably argue that political correctness - such as it is - accounts for a small proportion in the evolution of such languge. only a small proportion though... why else? baffled.

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Posts
    15,825

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by john eden View Post
    I wonder, is all the buzz word stuff just a way of pretending that you are hip when the actual job is the same old boring shite?
    Yeah, I reckon self-delusion probably has a lot to do with it.

    Sorry, I mean maintaining a role-positive headspace.
    Doin' the Lambeth Warp New: DISSENSUS - THE NOVEL - PM me your email address and I'll add you

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Oct 2004
    Location
    North East London
    Posts
    5,795

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by mos dan View Post
    good question. it's fair to say that the prevalance of management consultants and management speak has emerged in the last 20 years, right? surely there can't be a genuine belief in those circles that talking like that increases productivity (and therefore profit). you could probably argue that political correctness - such as it is - accounts for a small proportion in the evolution of such languge. only a small proportion though... why else? baffled.
    Yeah I think Mr Tea is onto something - perhaps it is about creating a positive and enthused mindset.

    So you don't just "have ideas" you "run things up the flagpole" or whatever. You don't "do your job" but are "pro-active".

    Even if people don't believe this stuff, if it's all they ever hear or are expected to say it probably does have a psychological effect.

    Plus, being sent on training courses can make workers feel rewarded/valued so if someone spends a day out of the office learning all this shit there is maybe a double whammy.

  12. #12
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Posts
    3,151

    Default

    One or two posts on this thread betray a troubling fluency.

  13. #13
    Join Date
    Oct 2004
    Posts
    5,899

    Default

    this stuff is just there to deliberately mystify very simple things, make them more confused and function badly, so that any blame can be put from the person who says this crap to the people who are confused that they aren't 'on the ball.'

    this is'nt a positive thing, a positive thing is digging in and changing and learning new things, developing, jargon is a mystical language that emphasizes polarity in the workspace, those who speak and those who don't -no wonder management consultants are the ones who use it the most. It's as if a persons contribution is less or greater due to a few flashy but meaningless words rather than their actual contribution.

    Marketing speak is the worst, marketing is a fairly simple thing, but there is so much jargon associated with it now, i think this is because people go to university to learn this kind of subject so to sit alongside other subjects that have alot of meaningless but encouraged jargon (continental philosophy for example), it invents words to emphasize that the subject is serious and worthy of three years academic study.

    people that say 'meet' instead of 'meeting', what's the point are they too busy to finish a word?

  14. #14
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Posts
    15,825

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by noel emits View Post
    One or two posts on this thread betray a troubling fluency.
    It sounds like your attitude isn't 200% positive, Noel. So I have to ask yourself: are you on the Ideas Train to Target City, or not?
    Doin' the Lambeth Warp New: DISSENSUS - THE NOVEL - PM me your email address and I'll add you

  15. #15
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Posts
    3,151

    Default

    I'm on the last freedom moped out of nowhere city and I haven't even told the boss what time I'll be back from the pub.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •