I want to write a small piece in response to reading the autobiography of Olaudah Equiano (the first in the genre of "slave narratives) but finding it hard so far to claw out the time needed.
...even though it is a different point altogether that Luke is making and more sophisticated, and subtle, and cosmic.
However I was interested and even amused to see Luke quoting Deleuze and Guattari and citing Pound after the abuse I got for doing the same back in 2004.
there's a pattern i have... i see something i cant absorb and understand in an instant and i bristle and angrily reject it... but i keep secretly going back to it and nibbling at it... trying to grasp it... and then i get it and once it clicks it'll be one of my favourite things.
im used to understanding things at a glance becuase i am so clever so it's the things that
resist me that keep me interested.
by the way i dont want anyone thinking i slaved over that thing. i wrote it in an hour or so, let's call it 45 minutes, while i was in bed. it took longer to type up on the computer than it took to write. please dont think i was sitting at a desk for a month agonising over comma placements.
anyway craner, when are you coming back on the scene. i need you. i cant do it alone. i keep telling you this. without you as friendly competition i cant keep the level high.
Soon actually, I have a couple of things planned, but they might be a bit passionless and political for you. However they are designed to get me back in the game and lead up to some more interesting things, like the fabled (ha ha, 5 years waiting) Balzac essay. Hell, I might not have a job by February, so writing will be all I have left, but that’s a whole other story.
i was knocking about with Jim the other day and he told me all about it.
don't worry, just treat it as a holiday if it happens, take a nice long break then when you're ready
something much better will turn up
I watched The Wolf of Wall Street last night and I remembered saying to you there was great art in banking and finance ready to be mined and it was exactly what I was trying to get at with this crap:
that's right. that was some of my favourite stuff. that's what you excelled in to my mind.
you cant escape the fact that you are an aesthete essentially. not a politician.
you have a genius for inventing characters and living through them. you can see the essential craner self in all these masks. i really love it. and the writing is so unapologetically stylish. none of that english dowdiness and self-effacement.
I know but I’m not sure I can write like that now. I was young then, even 29 when I wrote the last piece which was goodbye to all that even then apart from one last hurrah
you need to get the feel for weights and tempos and rhythms again. its the material essentially.
it literally is a feeling game. always materials. it's like learning to manipulate any other set of objects.
you come to internalise a feel for how they act. muscle memory stuff. just knowing it.
i know this stuff because i am the best writer in the world. if i tell you you have a natural gift that it is very important not to waste then you have to listen and obey. it's very important not to turn your back on your own destiny. it's equivilent to commiting suicide. it is a very grave sin.
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