Bryan Ferry Fanfic Thread

[IdleRich]

Always reminds me of trying (with no success whatsoever) to chat up Mira from Ladytron in the early 2,000s

 

[Murphy]

@suspended Yeah I didn’t read that

My Mum’s favourite band. They had this ‘presence’ among British broadcasters for a period when I was a kid. All the costuming had the same colour as trad Christmas decorations, those greens, purples, reddy hues sparkling like tinsel. Sprinkle among Whispering Bob off TOGWT, sorted

 

[sus]

Bryan was stumbling around London, drunk and belligerent one stormy, rainy night. He had heard a young poet by the name of Luka Heronbone lived in these parts... Apparently, this young poet had renounced his sobriety, and was throwing a big jubilee celebration with many liquors and beers. Bryan still smelled of sex from a soire with a painted gent on the tube, so he stretched the elastic band of his sweatpants out in front of him, letting the rain wash out his pubes. It pays to be presentable, he thought. That's a lesson I learned leading the multi-platinum, 8-album, Top-100 All-Time by Rolling Stone Magazine outfit "Roxy Music."

 

[IdleRich]

Always reminds me of trying (with no success whatsoever) to chat up Mira from Ladytron in the early 2,000s

Cos I was back in Oxfordshire doing nothing and she was doing her phd in genetics at the uni and running a club night I used to go to.

 

[sus]

Bryan was stumbling around London, drunk and belligerent one stormy, rainy night. He had heard a young poet by the name of Luka Heronbone lived in these parts... Apparently, this young poet had renounced his sobriety, and was throwing a big jubilee celebration with many liquors and beers. Bryan still smelled of sex from a soire with a painted gent on the tube, so he stretched the elastic band of his sweatpants out in front of him, letting the rain wash out his pubes. It pays to be presentable, he thought. That's a lesson I learned leading the multi-platinum, 8-album, Top-100 All-Time by Rolling Stone Magazine outfit "Roxy Music."

Finally, the street address of Heronbone's apartment came within view. Ferry felt a tingle in his ding-dong thinking about the possible promises of the night to come. And this "poet," Heronbone.... I'll heronbone him, Ferry thought with a smirk. He rang the doorbell. "Dinggggg dongggg," it chimed. Ferry smirked again. The apartment intercom fuzzed and came alive.

"Heronbone here, who is it?"

"He has a sexy voice... for a man" Ferry thought. He said, "It's Bryan Ferry darling, why don't you come down and suck me off?" There was a long silence at the other end of the line. "I'm just kidding darling," Ferry said again, wondering if this Heronbone fellow wasn't a little prudeish. There was a buzz, and the door swung wide.

 

[RWY]

 

[RWY]

 

[...]

Back in about 1997 my father pulled out his pristine gatefold copies of Roxy Music, For Your Pleasure and Stranded and said, "Huh. I don't know why I brought these. I hardly ever played them. I hate Prog Rock. Look at their stupid clothes! Do you want them?" "Yeah, alright," I said, cool as a cucumber and took them home.

 

[sus]

I've heard it said there are two kindsa people: avant folk and prog folk. Acker/Beckett vs Pynchon/Gaddis. This is board leans prog, right?

 

[grave]

That's funny Rich, I tried to chat her up in the early 2000s too.

It was some crap electroclash night at 333 and I was so mashed I was smoking a cigarette back to front. She took it out of my mouth and put it in the right way.

 

[...]

For the record, I never tried to chat up Mira.

 

[Leo]

She took it out of my mouth and put it in the right way.

that would seem to be a great opening to start a conversation! a humorous incident, she's taken the initiative to have an interaction, everything placed on a platter for you! were you too drunk?

 

[Mr. Tea]

Back in about 1997 my father pulled out his pristine gatefold copies of Roxy Music, For Your Pleasure and Stranded and said, "Huh. I don't know why I brought these. I hardly ever played them. I hate Prog Rock. Look at their stupid clothes! Do you want them?" "Yeah, alright," I said, cool as a cucumber and took them home.

I read the first few words of this and my heart was all a-flutter because I thought the rest of the sentence might be "...one of the birds from the front of Country Life" or something like that.

 

[grave]

that would seem to be a great opening to start a conversation! a humorous incident, she's taken the initiative to have an interaction, everything placed on a platter for you! were you too drunk?

It was more of a conversation ender, I'd already been talking to her for 5 minutes.

She seemed relatively sober so felt like an achievement she'd humoured a gurning idiot for that long.

 

[sus]

You Brits and your booze

 

[Mr. Tea]

You Brits and your booze

americans dont get drunk, they just say 'WOOP' a lot.

 

[IdleRich]

That's funny Rich, I tried to chat her up in the early 2000s too.

It was some crap electroclash night at 333 and I was so mashed I was smoking a cigarette back to front. She took it out of my mouth and put it in the right way.

No way! We were both in Oxford at that time and I would always give it a go... I remember she told me her band's new single was a rip-off of The Model and I said she was being modest.... and then I heard it. Later when I went to London I would see her round Hoxton every now and again too. Still she managed to resist my charms.... and yours too I'm glad to hear. Imagine my mortification If you had just popped up and said "yeah that's cos she was with me".

 

[IdleRich]

You Brits and your booze

He aint British.... and gurning is probably not a reference to booze. Otherwise spot on.

 

[Corpsey]

It's funny that Craner is a big Roxy Music guy but he hates David Bowie.

I thought if you were into one you were into the other.

 

[Corpsey]

@sadmanbarty have you shagged Mira from Ladytron?