Internet Cafes are Weird

IdleRich

IdleRich
"Kind of weird to look at a site like that in public ain't it?"
Hence the thread.

"Can he see that you're typing about him?"
I hope not. He must have known I could see though, he changed to reading news although the news he seemed most interested in was about a new tax on erotic films.

The guy next to me now is looking at semi-clad girls on some dating site and trying to chat them up. One stage less sad perhaps?
 

mistersloane

heavy heavy monster sound
I've really liked your posts from the cafe, there's something incongruous about writing about an internet cafe on the net while you're in the cafe that tickles me, you should do a blog or a book or script or something about it.

My best moment in our local one was having this big guy - kinda type who looks like he's on beta-blockers or anti-psychotics, overly large bloke, big pickie afro - just sitting there with headphones on singing 'Happy Birthday To Me' over and over again. It was disturbing for a while until I realised it probably was his birthday, and now it makes me feel all warm about humanity every time I think about it.
 
Jap ones are cool if you are clubbing or something and need to kill a few hrs until the train starts. Often you need to reserve in advance. They have private cubicles, you can get a cubicle with a reclining comfy seat if you want. You can take a shower and get food from vending machines and borrow comics for free. Often drinks are free too.
 

PeteUM

It's all grist
No reason why a man can't worship a foot. Come on, what happened to religious tolerance?
I love this idea that feet, legs, asses etc are worshipped with solemn piety by gentle religious souls rather than, say, in drooling lust by deviants obeying their basest urges!
 

IdleRich

IdleRich
"I've really liked your posts from the cafe, there's something incongruous about writing about an internet cafe on the net while you're in the cafe that tickles me, you should do a blog or a book or script or something about it."
Thank you. Unfortunately I'm in a cafe now and as far as I can tell nothing untoward is happening... I don't like it, it's too quiet.

"My best moment in our local one was having this big guy - kinda type who looks like he's on beta-blockers or anti-psychotics, overly large bloke, big pickie afro - just sitting there with headphones on singing 'Happy Birthday To Me' over and over again. It was disturbing for a while until I realised it probably was his birthday, and now it makes me feel all warm about humanity every time I think about it."
Yes, I concur, after reflection I think I'd take that as, on balance, a positive event.

"Jap ones are cool if you are clubbing or something and need to kill a few hrs until the train starts. Often you need to reserve in advance. They have private cubicles, you can get a cubicle with a reclining comfy seat if you want. You can take a shower and get food from vending machines and borrow comics for free. Often drinks are free too."
That sounds amazing... how much do they cost?
 

IdleRich

IdleRich
"Could be fatal, Rich."
I was guessing non-alcoholic ones....
Anyway, got a live one here now, he started watching pro-creationist videos, then loads of military videos (while crying!) and then a youtube video apparently called Jesus is Gay - I'm actually a bit scared.
 
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Mangakissa cost about 400 yen / hour, often you can get a whole night for 1000-1500 yen as far as i remember, it's been a few years since i was there.

the drinks are not alcoholic!

they started out as places to go and read comics but now they all have internet.
 

IdleRich

IdleRich
Someone in here is breathing really heavily, like Darth Vader or something. Can't tell who it is and I can't see anyone looking at anything that might cause them to do that, in fact they're probably just asthmatic (is that the right spelling?) but it's kinda creepy.
 

IdleRich

IdleRich
Here's a new on; went to ask for some more time and the guy is on his knees behind the counter, sign there says "Wait me two minutes I am praying thanks". Fair enough I guess.
Edit: Pretty sure he wasn't worshipping a foot.
 
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nomadthethird

more issues than Time mag
Here's a new on; went to ask for some more time and the guy is on his knees behind the counter, sign there says "Wait me two minutes I am praying thanks". Fair enough I guess.
When I lived on St. Nicholas in Bushwick there was this bodega run by Muslim dudes, right down the street from one owned by Mexicans. The Muslim guys would chant prayers really loudly all the time but they still had a whole wall of Mexican candles with Mary and the saints on them. (A buck's a buck I guess...)

The Mexican guys called me princess, the Muslim dudes would mostly talk to my boyfriend and not look at me.

Two ways to lose.

Sorry this thread is bleeding into another one in my mind.
 

IdleRich

IdleRich
Don't worry, I was trying to nudge it towards a meeting with the catholic/paedophile thread by introducing religion - that seems to be where all the action is at the moment.
 

IdleRich

IdleRich
OK, I'm back im back in the internet cafe after my flatmate slowly drestroyed our, admittedly very frustrating, home computer. First he smashed up the keyboard in a fit of rage which meant that he could only navigate using the mouse and write using copy and paste. That obviously proved too much for him and he finally put his foot through the computer and now it won't turn on at all. Anyway, the upshot is that I'm freezing to death here on in an internet cafe on my way back from playing squash, feeling my legs slowly stiffen - I was however pleased to be sitting next to a guy who put "big cock shemales" into the search engine, made it feel as though I'd never been away. You've really got to like big cock shemales to openly gawp at their pictures in a public place I'd say. The computer he was on was right by the stairs down into the place so the first thing that would greet a prospective customer was a load of BCSs. This bloke actually looked a bit like that guy Tony from the film Tony about a serial killer based in Dalston. He could have made some effort to tone down the creepy look but he's obviously just thought "fuck it, I'll embrace what I am".
 

baboon2004

Darned cockwombles.
This is without doubt one of the funniest threads on Dissensus, lookin gback through it. I clearly haven't been to enough weird internet cafes. Probably said this previously, but went to one in Portugal run by some Chinese people, who proceeded to have a row of such brutal swearing intensity that I swear I was scared someone was going to get killed. It was one of those ones with high walls between booths, so to stnd up and see what was happening seemed too risky.

I suppose a blog could also be based on you yourself going into the cafe and typing something outrageous, then waiting for/gauging reactions, but it sounds like you've got too much source material to need to do that.
 
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mistersloane

heavy heavy monster sound
I'd certainly be prepared to contribute to a fund which allowed Rich to be in the cafe for hours a day and writing up his experiences with a view to a book. Quite seriously. It's too funny to not want more of.
 
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