New member

a cheeky smooch after mid-level drinking. you're both a bit merry. both a bit silly. rosey cheeked. she's got lipstick on her teach.

a shag with the cute receptionist at the office christmas party.

all of which bought to you by possibly the most unfuckable man to ever grace god's earth.


Who loves ya, baby?
Fucking hell mate where did you find that
I think it was my Dad who first brought them up, said something about this horrible band from Macclesfield who were around in the 80s. They're surprisingly well-known.


New member

prim, bubblegum pink labia.

outstanding vaginal hygiene.

feeling good about herself. freshly shaved. new outfit for her new internship at vogue. new knickers.

aspirational, not quite perfect but trying, bridget jones sexuality.

a venus advert if it was about pasty british office workers instead of californian models.

(jungle snare patterns)


New member

dry humping. the foreplay's better than the sex. the foreplay might as well be the sex.

the throws of passion. the heat. lots of tongue. grinding. that desperate, urgent dance of tearing off clothes like vultures pulling meat off a bone.

primal. carnal. blood hungry. bottom lip biting.

hunting. tigress. mounting. david attemberough commenting in the corner.

growling. clawing.

the sex where you can't even cuddle afterwards because you're both so dehydrated. both standing there by the sink panting while your erection slowly deflates and starts to resemble rory stewart.


Active member
its interesting that brass has now entered our collective sonic lexicon as signifying a tongue in cheek smut
that goes back to jazz though doesn't it - the trombone in particular as this woozy raunchy sound... dissolute, swaying drunkenly... the parps and blares suggestive of the lower drives

jazz originally in new orleans was brothel music i believe

and then that association carries on with burlesque

Last edited:


Who loves ya, baby?
Liam Gallagher says he refuses to have saxophones on his records because "they're a bit pervy".