If you're going to be a hopeless mental drunken prick, you might as well do it properly:
just saw a drunk stumble past, it was great.. ya know, that rat-arsed, could hit the deck at any point stumble.. he was sporting a 'shakin stevens' - dressed head to toe in stone-wash.. combed grey mullet..
i was round at a mate's recently, one of the lads brothers came over.. he's an alcy - we had to wake him up from deep sleep on a piss-soaked mattress.. the first thing he did on walking into the garden (we was outside, blazing etc.) was walk straight off the stream bankside dropping a metre or so, face first into the water.. we spent the next hour rescuing him and his specs..
livened up the occassion! he's a harmless drunk.. not a violent drunk..
i saw a wastey hit the deck face first in clapham.. dozens stepped over him.. i asked if he was alright.. "i'm fine".. if you say so!