1. Logging into Vodafone who seem to have cut off our tv somehow (but not our internet luckily) to be confronted with the charmingly
personalised greeting message
Good afternoon First Name
Welcome to My Vodafone
2. This guy I'm friends with here came up in my facebook feed with some photos - the comments below made me laugh.
"All these photos of Portugal - have you moved there or something?"
"Yes, I have been here nine years"
I just looked it up and apparently when Portugal adopted the euro, the exchange rate was set at about 200 escudos to E1, so you could easily be "millionaire" in old money and still not have very much money in the scheme of things.
My girlfriend's mum got this message in her neighbourhood WhatsApp group. I think it works well as a piece of dadaist poetry. Try reading it aloud after a spliff or a few drinks:
"M m in mmmm I’m mnn m m. In b ok look non mmh look bmvmm moo m n o p.m. m I’m mm no In bmmomm I’ll mm book n mo pop IOU July min k mp in I’m m Kim mll I’m m look ppl mb on j jk on Kokomo ok kill Lon I’m Mbabane. I’m on IOU in on mom I’m l in m on Mon know I’m pmm m l pop n knob look m m n mchp GUIm n ok n mjiu job n n MC job m m in h lullmon BMW. In mom in inih m m non moo I kno ol Ip j o milk n n CBCn Bob long join jobbnn KB on m m lmnm mmm m kno j lol non look ok on moo n million mmh pop pm ok I’mm lamb popmnpm
M mon n kb I’ll inn on guylnmm I’m n mom join Li Lomb Ijj in Kokomo u lot V o mmh Nino m bin n NJ b join in J nonm m in MLB p ug mo mono lol m mn mm GM on in"