sadmanbarty
Well-known member
Your Life Story in 10 Songs
Your Life Story in 10 Songs
- Thread starter sadmanbarty
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sadmanbarty
Well-known member
yes
sadmanbarty
Well-known member
I like that Matthew’s life ended once he had kids
Woebot
Well-known member
it was game over. i ceased to have any value in evolutionary terms.
https://www.nature.com/scitable/knowledge/library/the-evolution-of-aging-23651151/
sadmanbarty
Well-known member
song 1
Infancy
my mum claims that when I cried as a baby, she’d sing this and I’d suddenly cheer up and stop:
Infancy
my mum claims that when I cried as a baby, she’d sing this and I’d suddenly cheer up and stop:
sadmanbarty
Well-known member
song 2
Early childhood
full of lots of fun and imagination. star wars, superheroes and pokemon were my major preoccupations.
In retrospect something happened during this time that’d have a major impact on me going forward. I wanted to play with my sister and her friends and she told me to go an play by myself instead, which I preceded to do and it was fucking amazing. I would go into these weird seizure things, genuinely in my own world; my eyes were closed and I’d make weird noises (my mum was worried I had a very severe form of torrents or autism) and I was completely immersed in these films in my head.
The effect I later deduced it had on me was to de-socialize me. Playing games with others as a child is presumably a crucial step in developing social skill and I completely circumvented it as a young age. I don’t think it’s a stretch to say that it impacted my way of engaging with society to such an extent that it foreshadowed me dropping out of school, refusing to have a with a boss, not particularly requiring proper friendships and generally having a very low social inhibition.
A lot of the games I was playing alone were within the world of pokemon.
Early childhood
full of lots of fun and imagination. star wars, superheroes and pokemon were my major preoccupations.
In retrospect something happened during this time that’d have a major impact on me going forward. I wanted to play with my sister and her friends and she told me to go an play by myself instead, which I preceded to do and it was fucking amazing. I would go into these weird seizure things, genuinely in my own world; my eyes were closed and I’d make weird noises (my mum was worried I had a very severe form of torrents or autism) and I was completely immersed in these films in my head.
The effect I later deduced it had on me was to de-socialize me. Playing games with others as a child is presumably a crucial step in developing social skill and I completely circumvented it as a young age. I don’t think it’s a stretch to say that it impacted my way of engaging with society to such an extent that it foreshadowed me dropping out of school, refusing to have a with a boss, not particularly requiring proper friendships and generally having a very low social inhibition.
A lot of the games I was playing alone were within the world of pokemon.
sadmanbarty
Well-known member
song 3
late childhood
I got an xbox I think for my eighth birthday and about a month later, just after Christmas my parents broke up. My dad stayed living with us for ages, about a 2 years. Possibly as an act of self-cocooning from the situation I became immersed in games like halo, rainbow six 3, manhunt, ssx tricky, etc.
I also fell in love with horror films around the time. Both the games and the horror films probably brought me closer to my dad than I’d ever been before. In my early years he’d had mental health problems, then did an M.A and all that so this was arguably the first time in my life I was getting attention from him; and video games and horror films were the medium through which I did so.
We’d have “boys nights in” just me and him where I presume my mum was dating her new boyfriend and my sister went to see friends (as she transisioned to being a teenager). That was probably a crucial element in why I’ve always maintained a great relationship with my dad, while my sister didn’t at all.
late childhood
I got an xbox I think for my eighth birthday and about a month later, just after Christmas my parents broke up. My dad stayed living with us for ages, about a 2 years. Possibly as an act of self-cocooning from the situation I became immersed in games like halo, rainbow six 3, manhunt, ssx tricky, etc.
I also fell in love with horror films around the time. Both the games and the horror films probably brought me closer to my dad than I’d ever been before. In my early years he’d had mental health problems, then did an M.A and all that so this was arguably the first time in my life I was getting attention from him; and video games and horror films were the medium through which I did so.
We’d have “boys nights in” just me and him where I presume my mum was dating her new boyfriend and my sister went to see friends (as she transisioned to being a teenager). That was probably a crucial element in why I’ve always maintained a great relationship with my dad, while my sister didn’t at all.
sadmanbarty
Well-known member
song 4
pre-teens
I got a drum kit for my 10th birthday and later that year dad moved out. So tons and tons of drumming. It completely took over me. Also dad had a dvd of the who ‘kids are alright’ documentary so every weekend I was at his (every 2 weeks) I would watch it. that meant I was watching it twice a month. Despite all the jazz influences and jungle and drill and dancehall and all that, keith moon is still very much a part of my drumming dna.
On the summer holiday going from year 5 to year 6 I got obsessed with the clichéd pop cultural history; the 50’s I rock n roll, the 60’s is hippy’s, the 70’s is punk, etc. so in that you can see the seeds that would eventually flower into me being obsessed with things like the hardcore continuum.
Crucially I had my first wank in an Egyptian all0-inclusive when I was 10.
pre-teens
I got a drum kit for my 10th birthday and later that year dad moved out. So tons and tons of drumming. It completely took over me. Also dad had a dvd of the who ‘kids are alright’ documentary so every weekend I was at his (every 2 weeks) I would watch it. that meant I was watching it twice a month. Despite all the jazz influences and jungle and drill and dancehall and all that, keith moon is still very much a part of my drumming dna.
On the summer holiday going from year 5 to year 6 I got obsessed with the clichéd pop cultural history; the 50’s I rock n roll, the 60’s is hippy’s, the 70’s is punk, etc. so in that you can see the seeds that would eventually flower into me being obsessed with things like the hardcore continuum.
Crucially I had my first wank in an Egyptian all0-inclusive when I was 10.
sadmanbarty
Well-known member
song 5
cusp of my teens
pseudo-intellectual, proto-psychadelic barty. My dad liked the incredible string band so got into psychadelia and mysticism from that.
I watched the documentary ‘superheroes unmasked’ that showed how superhero comics reflected the political climate of their time from the 30’s to the 2000’s. they mentioned this comic called ‘the watchmen’ so I went with my mum and bought it (I remember being in pizza express with my mum and she opened it up, and the first panel she saw was someone asking if the therapist had heard anything kinky).
From watchmen I got into things like sadman and invisibles which chimed with the psychedelia I was becoming interested in.
Reading up on the watchmen it mentioned objectivism and things like that, so soon started reading tons and tons and tons of philosophy books which ended when I read the tractatus and felt like it’d made all of philosophy redundant.
Because of that I shifted to politics and became a huge Chomsky-ite. I even did my work experience at the stop the war coalition. I got on really, really well with Lindsey german. She thought I was hilarious and also said that she thought all the girls fancied me which was wicked.
Due to the string band being all a bit musical with modes and funny instruments and because of my pseudo-intellectualism I started liking jazz and would go to café oto weekly at some point. I was obsessed with 60’s Coltrane and 70’s miles
My dad bought the cd of the incredible string band’s ‘the big huge’ around the time he moved from a shitty rental flat in bermondsey to proper house about 15 minutes away from my mum (meaning I could walk to his house rather than have to get a train). So the big huge is particularly associated with that time.
cusp of my teens
pseudo-intellectual, proto-psychadelic barty. My dad liked the incredible string band so got into psychadelia and mysticism from that.
I watched the documentary ‘superheroes unmasked’ that showed how superhero comics reflected the political climate of their time from the 30’s to the 2000’s. they mentioned this comic called ‘the watchmen’ so I went with my mum and bought it (I remember being in pizza express with my mum and she opened it up, and the first panel she saw was someone asking if the therapist had heard anything kinky).
From watchmen I got into things like sadman and invisibles which chimed with the psychedelia I was becoming interested in.
Reading up on the watchmen it mentioned objectivism and things like that, so soon started reading tons and tons and tons of philosophy books which ended when I read the tractatus and felt like it’d made all of philosophy redundant.
Because of that I shifted to politics and became a huge Chomsky-ite. I even did my work experience at the stop the war coalition. I got on really, really well with Lindsey german. She thought I was hilarious and also said that she thought all the girls fancied me which was wicked.
Due to the string band being all a bit musical with modes and funny instruments and because of my pseudo-intellectualism I started liking jazz and would go to café oto weekly at some point. I was obsessed with 60’s Coltrane and 70’s miles
My dad bought the cd of the incredible string band’s ‘the big huge’ around the time he moved from a shitty rental flat in bermondsey to proper house about 15 minutes away from my mum (meaning I could walk to his house rather than have to get a train). So the big huge is particularly associated with that time.
sadmanbarty
Well-known member
song 6
mid-teens
as I approached mid-teens sex became on the cards and I very had to quickly abandon everything I believed in, liked and enjoyed so that I had a chance of attracting a sexual partner in a school full of racist working class bermondsey people and black people.
Within the space of a couple of months I’d made the transformation from a chubby, jazz loving philosophy nerd to a lean, wigger dancehall enthusiast. I had a fake cockney accent and wore tracksuits and everything.
Rap at the time was fucking awful so even in my desperation to fit in I couldn’t pretend to like it. I really got into mid-90’s east coast rap to compensate, but that didn’t do me many favours other than with one boy who was a bit of a rap head (he’d listen to araabmuzik instrumentals and all that).
Road rap was equally shite. I liked ‘look what the cat dragged in’ and managed to shed (or at least subvert) my nerdy image by reciting lyrics from it.
Uk funky I liked, but it was dancehall that I could really get into. It was fucking amazing. This was all at the hight of the gully vs gaza feud so it was hyper aggressive and auto-tune was being introduced creating this weird alien, cyborg music unlike anything that’d come before it. the bloke who lived upstairs from me when I was a kid ran a soundsystem so I’d heard lots of dancehall when I was little at barbecues in the garden and all that, but this era was when I was forming my identity and I forged it in this music. It was a modern psychedlia that made sense in the context of the friends I was making and the part of London I was living in.
mid-teens
as I approached mid-teens sex became on the cards and I very had to quickly abandon everything I believed in, liked and enjoyed so that I had a chance of attracting a sexual partner in a school full of racist working class bermondsey people and black people.
Within the space of a couple of months I’d made the transformation from a chubby, jazz loving philosophy nerd to a lean, wigger dancehall enthusiast. I had a fake cockney accent and wore tracksuits and everything.
Rap at the time was fucking awful so even in my desperation to fit in I couldn’t pretend to like it. I really got into mid-90’s east coast rap to compensate, but that didn’t do me many favours other than with one boy who was a bit of a rap head (he’d listen to araabmuzik instrumentals and all that).
Road rap was equally shite. I liked ‘look what the cat dragged in’ and managed to shed (or at least subvert) my nerdy image by reciting lyrics from it.
Uk funky I liked, but it was dancehall that I could really get into. It was fucking amazing. This was all at the hight of the gully vs gaza feud so it was hyper aggressive and auto-tune was being introduced creating this weird alien, cyborg music unlike anything that’d come before it. the bloke who lived upstairs from me when I was a kid ran a soundsystem so I’d heard lots of dancehall when I was little at barbecues in the garden and all that, but this era was when I was forming my identity and I forged it in this music. It was a modern psychedlia that made sense in the context of the friends I was making and the part of London I was living in.
sadmanbarty
Well-known member
song 7
late teens
I quite school after gcse’s. I’d got all a*’s and a’s, the head of sixth form at my school wanted me to go study ppe and oxford and all this (I was even taken on a trip to cambrdige university by the school to get a flavor of Oxbridge life). But fuck that, I liked music and girls and hated school, i wasn't going to do any more school than i had to.
I did loads of jobs like leafleting and construction at the time. The worst one was being a courier for a pharmacy in elephant and castle and just seeing the abject horror of some people’s lives. these bed stricken people who were completely and utterly fucked.
I’m not sure quite how, but I ended up getting into the hardcore continuum. I guess through funky, which in turn would take me on to garage and grime and so on. Through all that of course I ended up finding out about simon Reynolds and reading those nuum wire essays which are hands down the greatest things ever written in the English language.
It was my absolute salvation all that nuum stuff. I’d do some shit job and then just go home and immerse myself in it all. Listening to tape pack after tape pack and old radio sets. It was complete and utter bliss.
My particular angle on it was naturally a bit of a dancehally one, so I was particularly obsessed with viewing it as growing out of the sound system tradition and it all being dub and dancehall and all that.
late teens
I quite school after gcse’s. I’d got all a*’s and a’s, the head of sixth form at my school wanted me to go study ppe and oxford and all this (I was even taken on a trip to cambrdige university by the school to get a flavor of Oxbridge life). But fuck that, I liked music and girls and hated school, i wasn't going to do any more school than i had to.
I did loads of jobs like leafleting and construction at the time. The worst one was being a courier for a pharmacy in elephant and castle and just seeing the abject horror of some people’s lives. these bed stricken people who were completely and utterly fucked.
I’m not sure quite how, but I ended up getting into the hardcore continuum. I guess through funky, which in turn would take me on to garage and grime and so on. Through all that of course I ended up finding out about simon Reynolds and reading those nuum wire essays which are hands down the greatest things ever written in the English language.
It was my absolute salvation all that nuum stuff. I’d do some shit job and then just go home and immerse myself in it all. Listening to tape pack after tape pack and old radio sets. It was complete and utter bliss.
My particular angle on it was naturally a bit of a dancehally one, so I was particularly obsessed with viewing it as growing out of the sound system tradition and it all being dub and dancehall and all that.
sadmanbarty
Well-known member
song 8
early 20’s
these are a bit of a blur. I don’t remember them well at all. Very directionless I think. Lots of insomnia. Lots of sexually impulsive behaviour.
Me and this girl had a sort of emotional affair while she was still with her boyfriend. He was (and for all I know) still is involved in gang stuff in peckham and there was this persistent intimidation campaign he launched against me. If I was ever at a party where she was all of a sudden people would start saying he’s sending people to come and get me. Hearing third hand that it was a bit of an on site situation and all that, which eventually made maintaining my friendships untenable. You can’t really enjoy socialising with people if you’ve got the threat of violence every single time you want to hang out, even if it was all bravado.
Music round this time had got shit too. I had gone from Reynolds and the continuum to sort of falling into a fact mag kind of thing. Getting into lots of rubbish internet music and all that, and I’d had to shed all my cool mates who might have pulled me away from that orbit.
One good thing from this time was I joined dissensus.
early 20’s
these are a bit of a blur. I don’t remember them well at all. Very directionless I think. Lots of insomnia. Lots of sexually impulsive behaviour.
Me and this girl had a sort of emotional affair while she was still with her boyfriend. He was (and for all I know) still is involved in gang stuff in peckham and there was this persistent intimidation campaign he launched against me. If I was ever at a party where she was all of a sudden people would start saying he’s sending people to come and get me. Hearing third hand that it was a bit of an on site situation and all that, which eventually made maintaining my friendships untenable. You can’t really enjoy socialising with people if you’ve got the threat of violence every single time you want to hang out, even if it was all bravado.
Music round this time had got shit too. I had gone from Reynolds and the continuum to sort of falling into a fact mag kind of thing. Getting into lots of rubbish internet music and all that, and I’d had to shed all my cool mates who might have pulled me away from that orbit.
One good thing from this time was I joined dissensus.
sadmanbarty
Well-known member
song 9
mid- 20’s
weirdly I remember this era quite fondly despite my mum having cancer (fully recovered, totally fine now) and having a nutty alcoholic bloke keep harassing me calling me a pedo.
Part of that was that my work changed, I started realising I could make money from music. I initially started teaching kids drums and guitar, doing music workshops and then managed to start scoring music for companies.
The social situation got better too. I managed to get back in touch with people and start hanging out with them again without any problems.
Also made a wonderful friend by the name of luke davis during this time. In him I found someone who had the same tendencies as me, had similar interests, grown up in similar circumstances. I finally had a mate who was like me. Who I didn’t have to condescend or anything. It was wicked.
Also through him I got to meet the phallic marvel simon Reynolds.
This was the song me and luke had on when we first docked each other (it appriately features a migo on it).
mid- 20’s
weirdly I remember this era quite fondly despite my mum having cancer (fully recovered, totally fine now) and having a nutty alcoholic bloke keep harassing me calling me a pedo.
Part of that was that my work changed, I started realising I could make money from music. I initially started teaching kids drums and guitar, doing music workshops and then managed to start scoring music for companies.
The social situation got better too. I managed to get back in touch with people and start hanging out with them again without any problems.
Also made a wonderful friend by the name of luke davis during this time. In him I found someone who had the same tendencies as me, had similar interests, grown up in similar circumstances. I finally had a mate who was like me. Who I didn’t have to condescend or anything. It was wicked.
Also through him I got to meet the phallic marvel simon Reynolds.
This was the song me and luke had on when we first docked each other (it appriately features a migo on it).
sadmanbarty
Well-known member
song 10
now
I have lots of wonderful friends on dissensus. They engage me and make me laugh and excite me and fill rainy days with something stimulating and joyful.
Cheers fellas
now
I have lots of wonderful friends on dissensus. They engage me and make me laugh and excite me and fill rainy days with something stimulating and joyful.
Cheers fellas