luka

Well-known member
obviously i do, but at the same time its designed to undermine the seriousness of it, to inflame and deflate at the same time, to accentuate the ridiculousness of it and to turn it into farce
 
I'm joking obviously. I like poetix best poet om this forum. And my views on hotness are well known and mostly (mostly) in accordance with his
 

IdleRich

IdleRich
The comments under clips of Holly Willoughby all read like Corpsey telling one of his poo anecdotes.

Balh _
2 years ago
I would smash her arse until it looked like grated beetroot.

Walter pinkman
2 years ago (edited)
I'd eat her for hours and hours and hours and hours and hours and hours and hours and hours..then I'd repeat the same thing on her shitter

EX7R3M3
3 years ago
JUST WANNA PUMP JUICE INTO HER ALL NIGHT LONG :D

cunty bollox
1 year ago
I'd love to grab them ponytails and ride her like sea-biscuit.

chooselife3000
2 years ago
Absolute stunner. Probably 100's and 1,000's thinking of spunking in her face, or over their own TV's with her pretty pretty face on it ha ha ha ha haha STUNNER absolute.
I don't get it

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poetix

we murder to dissect
There's a real "Celia shits!" energy around Holly Willoughby, like the OTT coarseness and violence of these comments is a reaction to her projection of wholesomeness. She's a nice-looking human being, no doubt, but the sexuality she represents is entirely passive, to-be-looked-at.

I remember Denise van Outen saying at some point that she understood her professional role to be "dolly bird", and was comfortable with that as a persona; but part of what made her appealing as a TV entity was a certain ready wit. She had chemistry with her co-presenter, Johnny Vaughan. Willoughby seems chemically inert by comparison.
 

luka

Well-known member
its also just that as barty was saying all english sexuality is expressed in that way. the language of sex in england is id mince her guts thats what we're like
 

poetix

we murder to dissect
Maybe the two things are related: inert, pedestalised objects of desire on the one side, hyper-virilised fantasies of sexual agency - powerful! destructive! Hulk smash! - on the other. Sex as profanation. There's a line in The Beastly Beatitudes of Balthazar B, a J. P. Donleavy novel that I'm sure Craner would enjoy immensely, where Beefy and his friend have two girls up in their rooms at Trinity College Dublin, and Beefy says "and now for the vile proddings", just before the college porters come crashing through the door and put a stop to proceedings. Vile proddings!

One of the more interesting things Gavin and Stacey did was to show James Cordon's character Smithy as someone who ostensibly thought about sex and relationships in exactly these terms, as a matter of finding a bird fit enough that your dignity wouldn't be compromised by having shagged her, and then doing it to her with gut-mincing athleticism and stamina - only to have him paired off with, and enthusiastically ravished by, Ruth Jones's indomitable Nessa, who amongst other things is understood to have bummed him with the handle of a toilet brush. Smithy's self-understanding as a sexual being doesn't recognise or acknowledge what he actually likes and wants, whereas Nessa knows both what she likes and, apparently, what he likes as well. This is of course consistent with the general tendency in British sitcoms to show men as fundamentally immature, and women as knowing them better than they know themselves.
 

luka

Well-known member
what really crystalised it for me was when i was working at Romford dogtrack and Nathan was recounting his exploits of the night before i got her to play the rusty trumbone
whats the rusty trumbone Nathan?
shes tonguing your arsehole while shes wanking you off
(performs a trumbone playing motion)
"proper degrading!" said with relish
 

poetix

we murder to dissect
There's that fascination with anal ("smash her back doors in" etc), which is entirely about getting someone to do something they are assumed not to want to - in Men Behaving Badly Martin Clunes and Caroline Quentin are in bed together, and she says something like "what do you want for your birthday?" and he starts to smirk and she says quickly "I've told you before, I'm not doing that again".
 

Mr. Tea

Let's Talk About Ceps
There's that fascination with anal ("smash her back doors in" etc), which is entirely about getting someone to do something they are assumed not to want to - in Men Behaving Badly Martin Clunes and Caroline Quentin are in bed together, and she says something like "what do you want for your birthday?" and he starts to smirk and she says quickly "I've told you before, I'm not doing that again".
dolphins.jpg
 

entertainment

Well-known member
let me tell you that i was watching an episode of sex and the city the other day and having never seen it before i thought it was going to be a fashion feminism take on sex, sort of mild but sincere critiques of the late nineties pop cultural representations of sex, maybe a precursor for some of the recent more realistic "takes" that you see on tv or with the new generation of filmmakers.

but it turned out it was the most cartoony depictions of sex i've ever seen. sex as an act completely independent from complex desire or emotion, suspended in it's own cultural economy. what is most "wild" is the best sex. your man does 14 different positions and takes and hour and a half to cum? amazing, must be the best sex ever!

it was very similar to what poetix is describing. but actually worse - now that i think about it - than that british locker room template banter because this was supposed to be "set the record straight" on sex - put out there the things we really think but never show. but than again maybe it wasn't that kind of a show.
 

poetix

we murder to dissect
SaTC has a very performative view of sex, for the most part. A whole series of partners who for one reason or another don't altogether measure up. Where it moves away from that model, it's not into a different view of sex but into a different notion of what provides lasting fulfilment - friendship, ultimately, of which the friendship between the four female leads is the central template. It never really reconciles sex and friendship, because it sees the former as a sphere of competition and the latter as a sphere of respite from competition.
 
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luka

Well-known member
ive never watched it needless to say but i remember a kpunk post about how its just a load of gays making gays talk out of the mouths of women
 
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poetix

we murder to dissect
It's an oddly homophobic show, given that premise. (Actually the people who really get it in the neck are the bisexuals)
 
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