Group Therapy

luka

luka

Well-known member
We had a little run before that where it was pretty fun. So you have stages, depending on who is involved and the way they interact. My feeling now is that a factionalised dissensus is the best way forward.
 
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sadmanbarty

Well-known member
i've tried several times to be nice and reconciliatory only to be met with accusations of disingenuousness and deranged conspiracy theories.

hopefully when the dust has settled and people have calmed down a bit they might reconsider.

this is just a forum. it doesn't have to be difficult.
 
luka

luka

Well-known member
The reason we can do this now is that we have the numbers. It would have been impossible a few years back. It was such a small group we were all forced to kind of play together
 
luka

luka

Well-known member
sadmanbarty said:
i've tried several times to be nice and reconciliatory only to be met with accusations of disingenuousness and deranged conspiracy theories.

hopefully when the dust has settled and people have calmed down a bit they might reconsider.

this is just a forum. it doesn't have to be difficult.
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I think tbh a lot of it is to do with weed. Patty and droid both smoke a lot of weed and I think the paranoia is pretty obvious. I used to smoke more than any man alive and i recognise the signs.
 
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sadmanbarty

Well-known member
possibly it would be better for the people who get grumpy with me and luke just to block us. we've tried our best and it doesn't really work.
 
luka

luka

Well-known member
And as I've said before Barty, no one else ever apologises or tries to see things from our perspective. And there comes a point where you have to go, wait a minute lol, how's this work?! Why do we have to perform this ritual humiliation every few months? This is a gross psychic-emotional economy we are running here. Let's end it.
 
pattycakes_

pattycakes_

Can turn naughty
luka said:
I think tbh a lot of it is to do with weed. Patty and droid both smoke a lot of weed and I think the paranoia is pretty obvious. I used to smoke more than any man alive and i recognise the signs.
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fwiw, i haven't smoked much at all since before xmas. someone gave me less than a gram a week ago and that's already gone.
 
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sadmanbarty

Well-known member
droid, i tried to pm this, but the cursed inbox was full:

Hi droid,

sorry for all this nonsense over the past 2 or 3 days.

also sorry you thought that original group therapy post was an attempt to rehash old arguments. it actually came out of a spat luke and craner had and i thought 1) it would be a bit tactless to use an example from that specific fight and 2) it had similar parallels.

you seem to take me trying to be tactful and reconciliatory as disingenuous, so i don't know what i can do about that other than to ask you to reconsider.

cheers.
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luka

luka

Well-known member
I'm not sorry. Barty is but I'm not at all. I'm really happy about it cos it's given me a reason to get rid of the dead weight. I feel liberated.
 
droid

droid

Well-known member
lol. Total bollocks. My weed consumption is embarrassingly miniscule. I actually get slagged for it.

The continued refusal to address the obvious core issues will not end well.
 
luka

luka

Well-known member
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Fuckng love it! Feels so good!
 
luka

luka

Well-known member
You've got paranoid accusations and fantasies from patty and thin lipped puritanical moralising from droid. And never has either one of them gone, hmm, how am I contributing to this situation? What fuel am I bringing to this fire. Because that demands self awareness and humility, which, for all that we are attached to our egoes, me and Barty are very good at.
 
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sadmanbarty

Well-known member
droid said:
It's that simple. When I gave out to you and Luka a few years ago, its because I felt you were repeatedly calling my name inappropriately. When I lost the rag at Luka over his catastrophe thread its because he pointedly called me out, even after I emailed and asked him to stop.
.
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by the way i have realised this recently. i remember writing luke a message along the lines of "no threads about individual users over 40" or something to that effect. so when he did the danny l thread i tried to nip it in the bud, he apologised and it was all fine.

but remember, again, that that's a temperamental difference that you're viewing as an insult. when luke does the neoliberal thread about me or says that i want covid to kill granny or whatever else, i don't perceive it as egregious. you do. neither of us are in the wrong or right about it, it just is what it is and maybe if somebody crosses the line by accident they should be given leeway.
 
luka

luka

Well-known member
You just think, fuck this, they can't get away with it, you know? And you just think of more stuff to say and like i say, it's compulsive. Remember they spent roughly 14 hours surrounding me yesterday and finger wagging, well you were too but you didn't go overboard. You said your piece and left it at that.
 
luka

luka

Well-known member
I guess we all want to ensure it can never be fixed. You know, make it final. Destroy it forever. So we can move on.
 
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sadmanbarty

Well-known member
droid said:
I think you're way off the mark with Baboon and Patty, and your summaries come off as pretty condescending TBH. Patty needs to learn to let go of grudges, but as I said, he has been OTM when it comes to a lot of the personal dynamics here, and a younger me probably would have reacted in a similar way to some of the treatment he's recieved. Disavowal of, or refusal to acknowledge reasonable grievances is a big factor in these extended conflicts.
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i pm'd baboon so he's privy to my thoughts in a bit more detail. apologies to him if my summary wasn't very fair.

far from disavowing patty's grievances i've asked patty loads and loads and loads publicly and privately what's upsetting him. he not once has said. this is the first i'm hearing that the deep house comment was hurtful to him. so no, i haven't ignored his emotional well being. i've asked him repeatedly what i've done wrong and he's decided to persist in being passive aggressive and malicious instead of talking about his emotions in a constructive way.
 
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sadmanbarty

Well-known member
version said:
Why do you all keep responding to each other?
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in my case it's in in the naive hope that things will change. so that baboon won't make up something i said and then repeatedly insinuate i hold beliefs that i don't. so that patty will take off the tin foil hat and stop being unkind to me. so that droid will go 'oh, i see what they didn't mean to upset somebody, it's just a a mix up'
 
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