Well-known member

this type of sweatpant- tubular, small cuff at the bottoms- became hard to find for whatever reason but they are the best


I'd love to get involved in the pyjamas game. In many ways a large part of me would seriously like to live in a world in which at a certain time I would announce "I am dressing for bed" - at which point I would don a beautiful pair of PJs in light blue silk with perhaps silver piping. They would ideally have a monogrammed breast pocket and I would team them with a silk dressing gown - itself possessing two pockets and a tasselled cord to tie them at the waist. And the final piece of the jigsaw would be some slippers; I haven't thought particularly of the design but I do know that they would be tastefully understated, luxuriously comfortable and ruinously expensive. Once so dressed I would no doubt pour myself a whiskey and soda from the bar in the corner of the billiard room and hold out my hand for my servant boy to place in it my opium pipe which would be prepared for me to smoke...

Sadly though it's way too hot here for any of that malarkey and for most of the year my nighttime attire is in fact just Chanel No 5, I'm more likely to drink beer before bed and my servant boy is fucking useless at preparing my pipe. And I'll be honest, I prefer it that way, I hate being cold and I'm more than happy to sacrifice that ridiculous fantasy of being some kind of Edwardian sophisticate - that noone would even see - in favour of a climate in which I can comfortably sleep, and in fact, can rise in the morning and make coffee which I can sip it on the balcony accompanied with a cigarette, without at any point feeling the need to fetch even the slightest stitch of clothing.


Cat Malogen
Deffo no jimjams

For bed you need your junk free, liberated, unrestricted by confines or clamping because one might venture into flesh, mightn’t one


Tatler exceptions

  1. The morning after a general election, if your husband has just won.
  2. When buying a bed at Peter Jones.
  3. When buying pyjamas at Peter Jones.
  4. At a Tatler pyjama party, which is a thing.
  5. At Torture Garden.
  6. At the Viva Mayr clinic.
  7. At an orgy.
  8. When they're by Olivia Von Halle.
  9. Or Poplin.
  10. If you are an actor in Bedroom Farce.
  11. If you are a small child on a long car journey.
  12. If you're Jacob Rees-Mogg and they're double-breasted.