martin
You have to remember that we won the war, unlike those French poofs who surrendered the moment the Jerries came into site. We smoke, eat and drink too much because we're hard bastards. The French think they're sophisticated by looking down their conks at our cuisine, but it's not our fault - while they were lazing around, eating cheese that stinks of athlete's foot and inventing new sexual perversions, we were spending all our dosh on weapons, to make sure the Third Reich got the hiding it bloody deserved. We didn't have time to make 'croque monsieurs', in any case, chops and boiled cabbage are good enough for any man. Also, we know we're shit at everything, so we don't have to try that hard or live up to expectations. Unlike your average fucking Italian, who throws a tantrum like a spoilt little pageant queen if you insult his pesto-guzzling old bat of a mum. Our transvestites are much better as well, they beat up straights in rugby shirts, the German ones just listen to shit microhouse and get upset if they chip a fake nail.
The Finns are pretty cool, they're the most practical, placid people when they're sober. Get a few bottles of vodka down them and they morph into viking beserkers, smashing tables to matchwood, headbutting their spouses and setting fire to their cars 'for a laugh'. The next day, all covered in blood and bruises and stinking of puke, they just have a shower and shave and go back to the office.