Chad — at this point not the cartoon but a real-world Chad, a handsome charismatic successful man like I-don't-know Zac Efron — lives in the virgin's head rent-free. The virgin can only see himself in the third person, from Chad's perspective. At the shopping mall, Chad is there, guiding the virgin to pick out his wardrobe. It must be safe enough to be approved by Chad yet not bold enough to somehow provoke him. In the gym, Chad is the virgin's lifting buddy; with each shaky rep the virgin grunts out he strives for Chad's approval.
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The paradox of course, is that Chad has never had Chad watching over his shoulder at all times. Chad is blissfully himself, Chad is free. The pick-up-artist community talks about this: they contrast themselves to men who are "naturals", those who fuck beautiful women without ever needing training in pick-up-artistry. To the rest of us, these men are like demigods whose powers flow from a mysterious source which can never be found, only cargo-cult reverse-engineered. No amount of learning pick-up-artistry can make a man a natural, in fact one risks getting so much farther away...
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The CHAD STRIDE must have been invented by a virgin who was finally fed up by this horrible double-bind. "What would not walking like a virgin even look like?!" he asks. The CHAD STRIDE is only that which the all-too-normal Virgin Walk is not. Where the virgin's clothes are neutral tones, Chad adorns himself in garish violent colors. While the virgin finds some exactness in his motions, the Chad lets his limbs fly out randomly in all directions. In order to not let loose strings of hair flap in the breeze like the virgin, the Chad fastens his hair into an immobile block.