shit in art galleries

IdleRich

IdleRich
Here are a few things that the typical visitor to such exhibitions would find even more challenging:

a) Stepping into Poundland without feeling ashamed
b) Buying a Take That album
c) Wearing Lonsdale trainers
I used to go to exhibitions all the time, and also Poundland. When I played 5-a-side twice a week I would obviously wear through trainers pretty quick, each time a pair got a hole I would go to those SALE warehouse places and buy the cheapest trainers that fit me - not actual cleats cos the surface was too hard, just all-purpose sports shoe that you could run around in and kick a ball with. If Lonsdale then so be it.
 

Corpsey

bandz ahoy
I went to see Nicole Einsenman at Whitechapel Gallery last Friday. Didn't expect much from it but thought I should check out some contemporary painting. And to my surprise it was GREAT.


Lately I've been more and more convinced that paintings can't be understood or evaluated via reproduction. You have to see them at the size they're supposed to be, with the texture of the paint and so on.

And this is certainly the case for Eisenman. The reproductions on the gallery web page look shit. In the 'flesh' they shine.

She's a witty and funny artist who has a knack for painting unforgettable cartoony faces, which you can ascertain from a reproduction, but you can't really appreciate how brilliant her use of colour is unless you go and see them face to face, which you should IMO.
 

shakahislop

Well-known member
saw a whole floor of a museum dedicated to videos of fish and other aquatic life, one of them was a kind of fish-based pornography, a close up montage of secretions, fish rubbing against things, plants that resemble vaginas
 

mixed_biscuits

_________________________
Quite an amusing outbreak of cost of living crisis rage in the comments for this royal academy post (Marina Abramović has drawn eyes on a rock and they're selling it for 3 grand)


The utter philistines in the comments will be reassured of the establishment's fine taste and discernment by the choice of winner for the Turner Prize.
 

mixed_biscuits

_________________________
The subversion of shared/obvious criteria for artistic merit is intentional so that the monetary value of works can be grossly and purposely manipulated insider trading style: the game is to buy a nondescript artist's work in bulk at a bargain basement rate before getting a couple of critics to inflate their importance and then selling.

Because the value of conceptual art is least effable we're basically stuck with it as it is the best means by which the above trick can be played.
 

shakahislop

Well-known member
got really bored of art recently. the whole thing of going to galleries and museum has started to feel like utter bullshit as well. it took about three three or four years for me, from starting to go to these places to being over it. weird how that happens. maybe there'd be some more life in it outside of nyc.
 

william kent

Well-known member
This is very @catalog and @shakahislop:

There are neither images nor narrative in Steve McQueen’s newest work, Bass, at the Dia Art Foundation at Beacon, about an hour up the Hudson valley from New York. Nothing but three stacks of speakers standing in the low-lit gloom of a concrete basement, and a grid of 60 flat LED light boxes sitting flush with the ceiling, measuring out the space between the rows of pillars and providing the only illumination in the large, echoing space. The light boxes glow red then tangerine, through yellows and green, blues and magenta and back to red, slowly drifting round the spectrum like a dial being turned.

Along with the light, sounds hang in the air. Sometimes the reverb goes right through you, then it’s a ghost. Slick with dulled reflections, the concrete floor is scored with old cracks and worn-away markings. The throb of bass notes ricochet from the walls and pillars, an underground shooting gallery of dub. Aching and surging, tailing off and picking up again, the music creates a space in which riffs and licks come and go are lost in reverb and harmonics, like snatches of language being dragged out of nowhere. Notes pulse like a human heart or a rudder in a current. Enormous tonal weights slide like so much unmoored ballast, blues phrases shimmer in complaint and there’s a constant sense of the impending. At one point a low hollow sound tunnels through the air like disaster looming.

 

shakahislop

Well-known member
that's class. you are totally right that i love stuff like that. might make it up there, we go every now and then, Dia:Beacon is one of the best art museums in the world, certainly kicks the shit out of MoMA. i have seen a very similar installation in exactly the same room a few years ago, by either Carl Craig, Carl Cox, or Craig Charles. it was brilliant, i must have mentioned it on here, was in the depths of the pandemic and being in a room full of no people but warm bass leaning against a pillar was pretty profound at that moment.
 

Mr. Tea

Let's Talk About Ceps
that's class. you are totally right that i love stuff like that. might make it up there, we go every now and then, Dia:Beacon is one of the best art museums in the world, certainly kicks the shit out of MoMA. i have seen a very similar installation in exactly the same room a few years ago, by either Carl Craig, Carl Cox, or Craig Charles. it was brilliant, i must have mentioned it on here, was in the depths of the pandemic and being in a room full of no people but warm bass leaning against a pillar was pretty profound at that moment.
I find it very funny that you can only remember that it was by one of three apparently interchangeable Craigs.
 

yyaldrin

in je ogen waait de wind
went to an exhibition yesterday without really checking beforehand what it was about, when i walked in there was a girl on stage wearing a strap-on dildo moaning and singing in the microphone all sorts of vulgarities, then later she walked through the audience and distributed little glasses filled with a white liquid and screamed "do with it what you want" and kneeled down on the floor. it was so awkward, everybody was staring at eachother and then of course people started to throw it onto her face and the rest of her body and then when that ended she took out a whip and started whipping herself.

after that there was a karaoke contest and people were singing lana del rey, the cure and t.a.t.u.



payed 8 euro to get in as well 🥴
 

yyaldrin

in je ogen waait de wind
the gallery is situated in an old dental practice, all of the non-supporting walls have been teared down and the ceiling is gone as well so you see all the wires and stuff like that. the walls are covered with those little white tiles you see in hospitals. it's one of these spaces that you'd see in a horror video game or a zombie movie or something. so imagine that and the performance. and then imagine that there was a child in the audience, i reckon he was about 6 or 7, honestly if i'd be the little kid i'd be traumatized or at least would have gotten nightmares. i felt like a total conservative being there thinking what is going on here. so if it did anything for anyone in the audience and least it traumatized a little boy, for the rest it made a bunch of people feel uncomfortable and maybe 1 or 2 people found it empowering? no idea really?
 

shakahislop

Well-known member
the gallery is situated in an old dental practice, all of the non-supporting walls have been teared down and the ceiling is gone as well so you see all the wires and stuff like that. the walls are covered with those little white tiles you see in hospitals. it's one of these spaces that you'd see in a horror video game or a zombie movie or something. so imagine that and the performance. and then imagine that there was a child in the audience, i reckon he was about 6 or 7, honestly if i'd be the little kid i'd be traumatized or at least would have gotten nightmares. i felt like a total conservative being there thinking what is going on here. so if it did anything for anyone in the audience and least it traumatized a little boy, for the rest it made a bunch of people feel uncomfortable and maybe 1 or 2 people found it empowering? no idea really?
i always like rubbing against the limits of my tolerance, it's interesting sometimes to realize that even if you'd disavow it that there is a line. there's a kind of self-knowledge there.
 
Top