O
Omaar
Guest
thx Carlos,
I think I like the Spawn of Satan explanation best though.
I think I like the Spawn of Satan explanation best though.
Invent Neo-Con strategies
- Thread starter luka
- Start date
Kidnap schwarzenegger and brainwash him. He returns to the governorship of California and immediately begins to exaggerate all that is Californian. School meals will all be replaced with tofu and salads. Everyone will be required to own a bicycle and have a six pack. Anal sex technique will be taught in schools as part of the sex education program. Special parks will be reserved in each major city for outdoor sex sessions. Pot will be legalised.
The governor's masterstroke will be the reinstatement of the "40 acres and a mule" policy except it is now a free Jacob the Jeweller watch and Escalade for every black person who emigrates to California.
The entire state will now be a hotbed of liberals, homosexuals and negroes.
At this point, the masterstroke occurs. Schwarzenegger begins to espouse virulently anti-christian policies and to propose secession from the US. The californian populace are too sedated by tranquiliser laced tofu, perverse sex and genetically engineered marijuana to notice.
A 'secret tape' will be found in which schwarzenegger molests "born again virgins" while wearing Lederhosen and a Hitler moustache.
At this point Washington can reveal that their only possible course of action is to place "tactical nukes" in the san andreas fault causing the entire state to slide into the pacific ocean thus ridding the US of democratic voters, black people and homosexuals in one fell swoop.
The governor's masterstroke will be the reinstatement of the "40 acres and a mule" policy except it is now a free Jacob the Jeweller watch and Escalade for every black person who emigrates to California.
The entire state will now be a hotbed of liberals, homosexuals and negroes.
At this point, the masterstroke occurs. Schwarzenegger begins to espouse virulently anti-christian policies and to propose secession from the US. The californian populace are too sedated by tranquiliser laced tofu, perverse sex and genetically engineered marijuana to notice.
A 'secret tape' will be found in which schwarzenegger molests "born again virgins" while wearing Lederhosen and a Hitler moustache.
At this point Washington can reveal that their only possible course of action is to place "tactical nukes" in the san andreas fault causing the entire state to slide into the pacific ocean thus ridding the US of democratic voters, black people and homosexuals in one fell swoop.
Well, we need to invade Iran obviously.
But why stop there? Let's keep on spreading the love. North Africa, Pakistan, Saudi Arabia, Malaysia, Indonesia. Southall. That halal butcher in Flushing, Queens.
Three little words that bring joy to my heart and a massive rush of blood to my cock: Tactical. Nuclear. Weapons.
Come on. You know you want to.
But why stop there? Let's keep on spreading the love. North Africa, Pakistan, Saudi Arabia, Malaysia, Indonesia. Southall. That halal butcher in Flushing, Queens.
Three little words that bring joy to my heart and a massive rush of blood to my cock: Tactical. Nuclear. Weapons.
Come on. You know you want to.
Dr. Jack Van Impe
Oh, that homosexual heathen.
Left = Liberal Pinko
Behind = Ass Fairy
Left Behind = Liberal Pinko Ass Fairy Nonsense
See, it's right there In FRONT OF YOUR EYES!!! If your sight has not been occulded by the dark forces of SATAN!
My book series will be so much better. It will climax with a risen Christ riding an ICBM into the hark of Satan's stronghold in Mecca whilst simultaneously GWB orders the castration of all homosexuals, every demon-possessed, family-hating one of them.
Oh, that homosexual heathen.
Left = Liberal Pinko
Behind = Ass Fairy
Left Behind = Liberal Pinko Ass Fairy Nonsense
See, it's right there In FRONT OF YOUR EYES!!! If your sight has not been occulded by the dark forces of SATAN!
My book series will be so much better. It will climax with a risen Christ riding an ICBM into the hark of Satan's stronghold in Mecca whilst simultaneously GWB orders the castration of all homosexuals, every demon-possessed, family-hating one of them.
AH yeah! That's the one. I love him, he's welcoming the apocalypse with arms wide open. Nobody else wants it like him. I imagine him sipping lemonade on his deck with a big smile watching the mushroom clouds on the horizon, maybe a tear rolling down his cheek. "Thank You Jesus, I'm coming home!" I'm gonna check that link now because I haven't actually seen anything from him in a long time and he must be ecstatic about the war.
Begin "Operation Jeb Bush = messiah" - a series of 'Wag the Dog' style TV spots where Jeb walks on water, transmutes one loaf of bread and a cod into enough Mcdonald's Fillet of Fish for all the people of the world to eat and locates missing WMD and Bin Laden - and other miracles. Electors restricted to church goers at next US election. Jeb romps it in.
scottdisco
rip this joint please
imprison and kill all your critics
oh sorry that's Eq' Guinea
oh sorry that's Eq' Guinea
luka
Well-known member
padraig (u.s.)
a monkey that will go ape
yah it's kinda messed up when your perverse satires turn out to be things that cats actually tried to do, isn't it? not the first time, won't be the last.
1st as tragedy, 2nd as farce, as they say.
(my favorite bit, when I heard about this the other day on NPR, was that U.S. intelligence dudes who proposed it wanted the video to be grainy, low quality, on the assumption that that would in fact make it more believable)
1st as tragedy, 2nd as farce, as they say.
(my favorite bit, when I heard about this the other day on NPR, was that U.S. intelligence dudes who proposed it wanted the video to be grainy, low quality, on the assumption that that would in fact make it more believable)
crackerjack
Well-known member
Dr Awesome
Techsteppin'
Well wouldn't it be a little suspicious if the "covert video" so happened to be 1080p?
padraig (u.s.)
a monkey that will go ape
yes. which is precisely why it's amusing. the whole 3rd-rate, tawdry spy novel element of going to pains to make the details of a scheme which is totally preposterous on its face appear as authentic as possible. quite reminiscent of Fidel Castro & the poisoned ice cream, exploding cigars, tuberculosis-infected scuba gear & so forth. Malcolm Gladwell's latest for the New Yorker actually concerns ridiculous intelligence schemes, the meta-levels of deception they involve & their generally dubious worth. as ever, Gladwell is simultaneously interesting & irritating, but it does seem that ironically, with spying, you're usually better off just playing things straight up, i.e. the most useful American espionage/psywar endeavor of 2003 was simply faxing Iraqi unit commanders reports about the general hopelessness of their situations. all the extraneous silliness just muddles things up.
You probly worked it out by now but I guess it's this.
