Roiling football blather
- Thread starter crackerjack
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- alan smith 17 arsene the glum aesthete basic schoolboy errors benitez the sad clown borderline rivaldo shithousing bromley spiritual healer chelsea :facepalm: dracula and his war council henry does an adam smith i am a holding midfielder of your face. jumpers for goalposts lads it's tottenham large samuel ole's at the wheel serie a epic fail shearer yawn shed ted square balls the special one traffordish waving imaginary cards
your manager subbed off Saka lmao. the mediocre English disease strikes again. It's almost comical by this point how much you uncircumcised degenerates consciously make it happen.
IdleRich
IdleRich
I wouldn't say that Leo. Unfortunately (or perhaps fortunately) I wasn't able to watch the vast majority of the game cos I had to go and DJ etc but the tiny bit that I did see looked pretty good. The only bit I saw was just after the first French goal up to the end of the first half, but just in that period it seemed as though a) the game was fairly open and b) England were playing pretty well - of course they had to respond to the goal and so you would expect them to be having a bit of a go at that point, but the way they were moving and the number of times they got the ball into dangerous positions meant that when I had to leave at half-time I was actually feeling reasonably positive about the chances of them equalising... while at the same time expecting them to totally balls it up one or another by the end - turns out I was right on both scores.
It was really cruel though, when I left, my phone which has been buggering around these last few days finally gave up the ghost which meant I couldn't check the score as I headed towards Lisbon and, when I did get into town, despite desperately craning my neck and trying to stare through the downpour and the blurred windows at the big screens in various bars I just couldn't see the score. But actually, I was so convinced that England were going to lose that a large part of me didn't even mind that much about not getting to see the game....
IdleRich
IdleRich
Sorry Leo, let you down mate, but today would have to be the day that was arranged for Saul from Fat White Family to play in Lisbon and there was simply no way that I could get out of dj-ing and driving him around afterwards. A bit of a shame to end like that without even seeing the game but none of the people involved in organising it were fans of English football I guess.... I can't blame them though, when I book things I never ever think to check what else is happening that day and, no doubt, I would have made the same error.
Like I say though, I was able to catch part of the first half, but I missed the goal cos I was watching it on some dodgy link which momentarily went down - and then the sound came back up but not the picture and, reading between the lines, I could tell France had scored - and my first thought was something like "fuck, I would have stopped that if I'd been watching".
Which is obviously nuts. I guess it was just the response of my cruelly ravaged mind to one of the most sickening possible football watching occurrences ie when the link dies and comes back up only for you to discover your side has conceded. It's even bad enough when your side scores in that situation and you don't know whether to celebrate or be angry that you missed it, but to have the score seemingly magically changed against you while you were hurling curses impotently - in fact extra-impotently - at a blank or frozen screen is like being kicked in the nuts by some kind of invisible malignant spirit.
IdleRich
IdleRich
Loads of times, an hilarious own goal of that (or any other) nature is one of the greatest joys of football - as long as it's not your team obviously. But there have been all kinds of unbelievable own goals with players accidentally managing to make their backpass into an unstoppably accurate shot that they could never hope to pull off at the other end in a million years. There have been keepers slipping and throwing the ball into their own net, booting it out and hitting their own player and bouncing back past them, I mean there really have been some absolutely fantastic ones over the years, just thinking about some of them is actually cheering me up a little in fact. Maybe in this thread even there was a bit where we posted some classics of the form - I also remember asking about own goals (own baskets?) in basketball and discovered that it does occasionally there too.
But a quick youtube search turns up a load of goalies making what seem like almost impossibly bad cock-ups. The gloves obviously have a sort of grippy rubber which is aid to with catching and in most of these instances it appears to be that which has spoiled their release and ultimately brought about their undoing - but it's not THAT sticky, it doesn't excuse these kinds of errors... in fact nothing excuses these... enjoy
I'm not sure what level those were, but this was a very famous clanger for England by Robinsion, I can only find it in really low quality and the only explanation I can realistically come up with for that is that Robinson spends every waking minute on the internet deleting any video of the incident that he can find... certainly, if he doesn't then he should do (actually, I'm being unfair, when you see the way that the ball bobbled past him it was extremely unlucky - that really was like some invisible imp had it in for him)
Also, I don't know if you remember the last time England played the US in the world cup before their 0 - 0 bore draw this time round, but I do, and that was also a draw, although on that occasion England at least got the ball in the net and would have won if not for this goalkeeping howler
No real excuse for that though that I see, just horrible goalkeeping that makes the Portuguese keeper I was moaning about look like Gordon Banks.
Being a goalkeeper means you are always under terribly high pressure, there are plenty of outfield players that have made loads of mistakes that show the same error level in terms of competency or lack thereof, but unless they led to a goal they have been long forgotten, while international goalkeeping errors that cause a team to be eliminated from a tournament are destined go down in history and be replayed again and again, both on tv clips and on the insides of the hapless keeper's eyelids as they wake in a cold sweat every single morning (and quite possibly several times a night) for the rest of their entire life. I don't know how people recover from that kind of thing... both to get back and play the game, and also simply to come to terms with it as a person. I'm sure many don't - there must have been players who have never been the same after one horrible moment (what happened to the Liverpool keeper after he gave Madrid two goals in the final about three years ago?)... and there was that Colombian player who was murdered after he scored an own during the world cup.
IdleRich
IdleRich
Or. I should probably add in, it might also be remembered if the error is something like, I dunno, a crucial penalty miss in the 84th minute of a world cup quarter final.
Leo
Well-known member
that one's unfortunate but that's not as egregious as the ones rich posted.
IdleRich
IdleRich
Crazy that they play with white shirts vs white and light blue... maybe it's not as bad when you're close up but on telly they look like the same team.
IdleRich
IdleRich
In terms of outcome this was one was not too serious... but what the hell was he thinking? How did he pull that off?
And this Lee Dixon one is an absolute classic that gets shared again and again. What you have to remember is that the backpass rule came in in the 90s (I think it was) and that was a new rule which meant that if you pass back to your keeper then he couldn't use his hands - and obviously in the first few seasons that rule caused a few cock-ups as people got used to it. But this Lee Dixon goal was before that came in I think so Seaman would have been totally entitled to save it with his hands, he was simply unable to get near the perfectly weighted chip
IdleRich
IdleRich
There are just so many beautiful ones out there, I love the way that with this one he took the extra touch to set it up
This one more of a freak
Often what makes for a classic own goal is when the defender is trying to put it safely into row y and he really gets a lot of power into his intended clearance
Though this one is noteworthy for its finesse
This one more of a freak
Often what makes for a classic own goal is when the defender is trying to put it safely into row y and he really gets a lot of power into his intended clearance
Though this one is noteworthy for its finesse
Mr. Tea
Let's Talk About Ceps
When the cock-up is so excruciatingly embarrassing you need two watches so you can be sure to accurately log the time it happened.
WashYourHands
Cat Malogen
mmmm, salty tears
Leo
Well-known member
yes! that one and the one before it are what I was asking about. not times where it's the fault of the guy who kicks it, but the fault of goalies who horribly mishandled an easy one sent their way.