Last day of work

STN

sou'wester
It's my last day of work before starting a new job today, so I am lurking in the corridors shrieking at people and generally being a nuisance.

Anyone got any good last day of work/school tales?
 

stelfox

Beast of Burden
i still haven't heard the end of getting very drunk on the final day of my last job and deciding to phone people when i got home. most thought it funny. unfortunately others didn't
 

m33k +i93r

TheUnridiculousBearMix
how about one of each? :)

last day of high school: our year group requisitions both the common room and one of the barely used languages classrooms for the entire day, of course nobody of note bothers going to classes. some kids bring in two pairs of boxing gloves and padded helmets and start one-on-one punch-ups in the common room in which half the year creates a chanting, goading circle right next to the IT suites and generally causing a massive ruckus the whole day, until eventually the pleas of the IT teachers get heard by the deputy head and he confiscates the boxing paraphernalia, almost reaching a point where some of the more jumped up bods in the fracas suggest lynching him for doing so, as you know, "it's our last day - what are they going to do?".

the languages classroom was a hang out for those who only wanted to dip into the boxing and inevitable playground fights/football etc and just generally make a mess and doss around. the classroom by 12:30 looked like a bomb had hit it. my personal contribution: walking up to the formal presentation of leaving certificates wearing the famous Inspiral Carpets 'Stoned Cow' t-shirt with the emblazoned logo "COOL AS FUCK" and revelling in the look on the flabbergasted headteacher's face as he reluctantly shook my hand. Also writing "[very newly-appointed, deeply unpopular headteacher's name] SUCKS COCK" on the wall, and getting to watch the knowing deputy head wipe it from the wall, the look on his face the whole time suggesting "yeah, I get it. he is an arsehole".

last day of work: after spending a low-rent summer between years at uni working at a strip joint in Bristol (fairly classy and aspiring to be high-rollers style, not sleazy in the basement titty bar sense at all. no full frontals, mostly costumed pole dancing, that kind of thing), and having been one of the foundational members of staff having been there when the club was opening even doing some of the decorating, i'd become pretty well integrated into both the (lovely, young and slightly out-of-their-depth like me) bar staff as well as the middle echelons of the management structure. One of whom was an ex-stripper from Toxteth with a major Jones for champagne/coke (naturally really) and a serious aspirational drive to oust the (also out of his depth) bar manager, who had throughout the three months taken somewhat of a shine to me though sexual activity was definitely out of the question. So the last shift comes along, and by way of thankyou this Toxteth blonde decides she's going to station me away from my normal role as near-progenitor of the downstairs bar to 'waiting guests' upstairs where the action was. So I go upstairs and she walks me to a position facing the main pole, next to the bouncer for the VIP area, and basically says "yeah, just stand here", as if to say - enjoy the show!!

ten hours of hot strippers and a fair amount of discounted or swiped booze later, and she decides she's going to incite an all-nighter with all members of bar staff present in my honour, so we all trundle back to her hotel room (acquiring questionable material along the way of course) and start a humongous 20-person pillow fight, the entire room being covered in feathers by the end at 8am. At which point me and some of the other seniorish bar members take a trek across town and spend the rest of the morning chilling in a park on a mattress from one of their bedsits.

good times.
 

STN

sou'wester
I've done ye olde timed emails from Outlook thing as well, don't think it worked though. Last job I left I fell asleep in my kitchen and was feasted on by a wyrd slug while colleagues danced around my fallen form.
 

Mr. Tea

Let's Talk About Ceps
ten hours of hot strippers and a fair amount of discounted or swiped booze later, and she decides she's going to incite an all-nighter with all members of bar staff present in my honour, so we all trundle back to her hotel room (acquiring questionable material along the way of course) and start a humongous 20-person pillow fight, the entire room being covered in feathers by the end at 8am. At which point me and some of the other seniorish bar members take a trek across town and spend the rest of the morning chilling in a park on a mattress from one of their bedsits.

good times.

I got to this paragraph and though it was going to turn into some obnoxious Nomad*-esque "...and then we did loads of coke and had a massive orgy"-type 'confession'/boast, but the idea of a drunken 20-person pillow fight makes me :D.

*don't ask
 

UFO over easy

online mahjong
I got to this paragraph and though it was going to turn into some obnoxious Nomad*-esque "...and then we did loads of coke and had a massive orgy"-type 'confession'/boast, but the idea of a drunken 20-person pillow fight makes me :D.

*don't ask

she's probably reading this and sticking pins into a paper mache doll with "MR TEA" written in marker on its forehead as we speak
 

tom pr

Well-known member
she's probably reading this and sticking pins into a paper mache doll with "MR TEA" written in marker on its forehead as we speak
even better would be just a tea bag with a smiley face drawn on, a bit like the milk carton from that blur video.
 

zhao

there are no accidents
At a temp job I threw a tomato at a teamleader, but I'm older now...

similarly -- thinking back i'm impressed with my 14 year old self for having planned (saving eggs in my room for 2 weeks), and carrying it out.:

5th grade / total bitch of a bus driver / rotten eggs / last day / perfect aim / all the kids rejoice / I am a hero.
 
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