Worship the colossal squid, puny humans!!!

HMGovt

Bamber Clatscoigne
WOEBOT said:
true story:

once when i worked at an advertising agency (WCRS) as a practically intern-level junior employee (first job) as a prank i left a 3 foot-long squid on the star creative's desk when he was out at lunch.

jon, that squid isnt real. is it?
How strange. I was invited to the Christmas Party of an ad agency I was about to join a few years ago and had to buy a secret santa present for the art director. He ended up with a tentacle-packed jar of squid from Sainsbury's, mainly because it rhymed with the budget of 'five quid'. Turned out his boyfriend was mortally allergic to squid and other fruits of the sea, so I expect it got binned.
 

zhao

there are no accidents
Cthulhu

“If I say that my somewhat extravagant imagination yielded simultaneous pictures of an octopus, a dragon, and a human caricature, I shall not be unfaithful to the spirit of the thing. A pulpy, tentacled head surmounted a grotesque and scaly body with rudimentary wings... It represented a monster of vaguely anthropoid outline, but with an octopus-like head whose face was a mass of feelers, a scaly, rubbery-looking body, prodigious claws on hind and fore feet, and long, narrow wings behind. This thing, which seemed instinct with a fearsome and unnatural malignancy, was of a somewhat bloated corpulence...” (“The Call of Cthulhu”)

There are some who are of the opinion that Lovecraft borrowed the name “Cthulhu” from Sumerian mythology. This is a hoax perpetrated by the “Simon” hoax edition of the Necronomicon which combines elements of Sumerian mythology and the Lovecraft myths. The name “Cthulhu” was purely an invention of Lovecraft’s. His sketch of Cthulhu may be seen at Robert Arellano’s “The Lovecraft Web”.
 

Yoghurt Sothoth

Lord of the files
confucius said:
yeah what happened to that Yoghurt? ain't been around lately... he a funny bunny.
Verily, I have been constructing a Cathedral of Grogans amid the inner folds of the Rectosphere that is now Old New Orleans. I wish ye mere mortals could lay thine eyes upon it's mesenteric, pus-glittered halls, bejewelled with embers of swill, and so on. 'T was a formidable task, even for an Old One such as I, one who marshals a limitless horde of mire-born encrustlings, feverish with turdic energies. The very same has occupied most of what thou know as 'summer', though that is a mere blink of one of my countless, sightless eyes.

A thousand stains and smirches be upon you all, loyal mortalry.
 

zhao

there are no accidents
Yoghurt Sothoth said:
A thousand stains and smirches be upon you all, loyal mortalry.
that is all very nice and dandy... but great Mr. Sothoth, the funniest bunniest of all them all, do you have anything to say regarding Cthulhu the Great Collosal Squid God???

(I bet Yoghurt is one of the other regulars here under a different alias... matt? hmmm...)
 

Melchior

Taking History Too Far
confucius said:
(I bet Yoghurt is one of the other regulars here under a different alias... matt? hmmm...)
Time to check the IP logs.

I think that Yoghurt is actually a Deep One from Innsmouth.
 

Woebot

Administrator
Staff member
confucius said:
that is all very nice and dandy... but great Mr. Sothoth, the funniest bunniest of all them all, do you have anything to say regarding Cthulhu the Great Collosal Squid God???

(I bet Yoghurt is one of the other regulars here under a different alias... matt? hmmm...)
i know who the yog is. i discovered the grisly fact from matching his IP address. but it aint me!

agatha christie style i can reveal that the yog is lurking among us on this very thread!
 

Melchior

Taking History Too Far
WOEBOT said:
agatha christie style i can reveal that the yog is lurking among us on this very thread!
Presumably you mean in his original poster guise, rather than his Black Dairy Product With A Thousand Sons guise?
 

rewch

New member
WOEBOT said:
i know who the yog is. i discovered the grisly fact from matching his IP address. but it aint me!

agatha christie style i can reveal that the yog is lurking among us on this very thread!
who is it? oh... go on... tell us... or is it going to be un-agatha christie-style/more like real life & we'll never know?
 

zhao

there are no accidents
ah ha. I knew it. my hunter instincts told me that something was amiss when the elusive Yog turned up with such swiftness... AS IF HE WERE HERE ALL ALONG. and it didn't take a master of deductive reasoning (not that I'm not one) to conclude that he is indeed the misleading alternate guise of someone else whom we all (think we) know and trust.

:confused:

it's not martin... not matt... pretty sure it's not Mr. Eden (hope I'm not making a deadly mistake here. but my spider sense tells me Eden is OK). it would be too perfect if it was Melchior... hmmm...

thus far I can see 3 posibilities: Yog -

A. consults a middle english dictionary each time before he posts
B. is some sort of dodgy scholar of history
C. is a Dungeons and Dragons roll playing freak
(like this guy: http://www.viceland.com/issues/v12n6/htdocs/the_dark_001.php )

does anyone you guys know fit any of these descriptions?
 

michael

Bring out the vacuum
Role players with an interest in history?? Seems unlikely. ;) Happy to leave the mystery alone, I reckon.

I've found a great fact sheet on the giant and colossal squids. In there the giant squid does have the huge luminescent eyes, whereas the colossal squid (the one in that BBC article) does not. See fig. 8 for an example.

Don't forget to look at fig. 4 for the BARBED TENTACLE CLUBS OF THE COLOSSAL SQUID!!
 

Melchior

Taking History Too Far
confucius said:
A. consults a middle english dictionary each time before he posts
B. is some sort of dodgy scholar of history
C. is a Dungeons and Dragons roll playing freak
Holy shit. It's not actually me, as my sense of humour doesn't run that way but I've just finished my MA in history and ... I am a current roleplayer.

There, it's out and I've said it.

I've never done an alt on a board, but maybe I should start? :rolleyes:
 

rewch

New member
found i squid text whatever you call it ;-=

found 1 smiley

& in a fit of boredom/inspiration made one:
 
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