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It could be a trip going into work knowing you don't need to - just goofing around, openly drinking in the office and seeing what it takes for HR to fire you. Who am I kidding, I'd be on the first plane to Tokyo.

There is no god, no karma: Mr Goodchild is the wealthiest singleton to go public, the National Lottery confirmed. He told of celebrating on Saturday by doing "what I was going to do anyway" and watching the Wales rugby union team clinch the Six Nations Grand Slam with his father. He said: "(We...

If I’d invented a pain-free, instant cure for cancer at the age of 7 – in between perfecting battery-powered cars, bringing peace to the Middle East and becoming the youngest person to sail round the world on a car tyre – showing the faintest whiff of ‘pride’ in these achievements would made me...

THE CHICKEN WON'T STOP -< -< -< -< -< -< -< -< -< -< THE CHICKEN STOPS HERE "New Dawn Fades" is the best song ever.

Ironically, the Marquis De Sade's letters to his wife are mainly him complaining about the prison laundry service or mildly telling her off for not sending him money quickly enough. Think "a kiss for each bum cheek"'s about as racy as it gets.

A tune that reminds me of early childhood. My sister used to tape the Capital Radio chart rundown and kept certain ones she liked, and that song was definitely one of the highlights... ...tho sadly tempered by Kid Jensen gabbing over the closing chords, "A good one to listen to in the bath!"...

Wasn't another possibility that they ARE picking up our messages - but, by the time they arrive, we've all been dead for hundreds of thousands of years? I guess we could move to Keppler 22b, but you'd have to spend a similar amount of time getting there on some massive city ship. By the time...

I can see Brendan O'Neill kicking himself, "Shit, why didn't I think of that?"

I kind of agree with them, though - I've listened to a fair chunk of this stuff, from twee British psych (like Kaleidoscope, Open Mind, Bulldog Breed, etc) to the (preferable, IMO) US stuff on compilation series like Nuggets, Acid Visions, Pebbles, etc. Some of it's great, but most of these...

Cleaning up is boring but if you can't get motivated, watch "The Hunt For Britain's Paedophiles". EVERY child-bender they arrest lives in a complete shithole - beer cans and empty pot noodles all over the carpet, garbage in the bathtub, kitchens piled up with stained shopping bags, ferrets...

5-6 hours on week nights. Always been a night owl, would probably stay up til 4-5am most week nights if I didn't have to work. But rarely crash out before 1am as it is. Should I be worried? I don't feel that bad for it, but maybe all the sleep debt's building up, ready to hit me hard one day...

Huh? When did Moloko get saddled with this reputation? Sounds like you're talking about Broadcast fans. 'Sing It Back' was the song all the drunk girls down Colindale used to dance on the table to during pub lock-ins.

I remember a friend locking herself in a toilet cubicle in Luton Bus Station after downing a bottle of white cider on her 18th birthday,threatening to immolate herself with a cigarette lighter and violently sobbing "I CAN'T BE THE DANCING QUEEN ANYMORE". She knew the score. Being a delusional...

Was going to say "Straightface" by Xylitol redone by Pete Um, but it's not on Boobtube. Have this instead

Sorry, that maggot cheese looks delish. Most gross food I've ever seen is balut - basically a duck abortion. Though Heinz 'all-day breakfast in a can' probably runs it close. More of a weird personal quirk, but the smell and taste of beetroot makes me gag.

Wow, all that booze last night isn't hurting at all! Have a space-conquering next 50

I'm semi-trolling. Cats are alright - apart from smothering newborn babies to death in their cots, to eliminate competition for resources. And their contributions to witchcraft. You're right though - don't own a dog if you can't handle LOTS of shit. A big noxious, wormy, wet mound of shit.

Dogs >>> cats. My favourites are German Shepherds, but I’m biased because I grew up with them. Some of my family in Ireland had Kerry Blues, which look like something out of ‘2000AD’. Afghan Hounds look like Nicky Clarke and are really fun until you let them off the lead - then suddenly...

The toilet in the 150 Bar in Old Street (RIP) was quite the trip. One night I narrowly avoided a jet of hot piss as I walked in (it squirted inches from my shoulder) – one of the locals was waving his cock around in the air, randomly aiming all over the walls and floor like a crazed sniper in...