Cant remember when I last smoked. Maybe Xmas. But you'd have thought the dreams would have come by now if it was just the weed. This is more like the flicking of a switch to open the floodgates. That's why I think the acid did it. But who knows. It was literally the first proper sleep after the trip when it started, and every sleep since then has contained at least one elaborate dream. I have to admit that I took a couple of naps when I got home from work this eve to see what would happen! Lo and behold. More dreams!
Well, I'd say this last trip was close to what I think our resident hardcore mfer third would describe as a horror trip. It was inside a club on Friday morning (the only one still open after nye), on a secluded high platform, but still totally connected to a big room which was in a long ambient chill out phase. Some dark electronics played. Didn't recognise any of it, but it was all fantastic and perfect for the moment. Several negative events happened over the next few hours including the one guy I'd met in there thus far purposely trying to make things uncomfortable and also ripping me off, which should have sent me spiralling, but I just let it all go and laughed at him. There was also a Christmas Carol-esque trip through my conscience with something like a satanic choir made up of all the clubbers singing, shrieking and laughing from every direction in the darkest and most brutally honest way possible. Real or not, it didn't matter. This was probably the most 'constructive' part. I think the key was, without it being an effort, not letting fear enter, and knowing that whatever happened was to be, temporary, and not worth holding on to. Just let it wash over and pass no matter the intensity. It was like walking underwater, at night, near the surface, several strong currents all at once but keeping a straight line. So many forces pushing and pulling, but allowing them to do their thing. After maybe 3, 4, or 5 (fuck knows) hours, it was time to get back to the action. Stayed another day or so, met some people, had some chats, but most importantly danced my fucken ass off..
Saturday night, surrounded by techno vikings and ogres, totally immune at this point. The scarier they looked, and there were some proper naaaasty looking fuckers in there, the funnier they were. Menacing giants all on k and meth. Shaved heads and taught, teutonic faces. Malevolence and menace in their huge glaring eyes. Pneumatic jerks and sinewy shuffles.. when the beat dropped, they expanded to double size and grinned like their brains had crystallised. The music had gone up a couple hundred gears in intensity and I was feeling it. Mentally, emotionally and energetically I was on. But, a guy I'd met there and had been hanging with after the trip came to me in a bad state. Could barely talk, eyes like lazers, all tense and totally out. So I decided to make sure he made it home safe. I slept maybe 10 hours at his place and then went back to mine. For a while I couldn't sleep and my body clock was all fucked, so I decided to watch a film. Had a bunch to watch but nothing grabbed me, until I moused over Fight club.
And god damn was that exactly the film I needed to see right there and then. First time in over 10 years. The scene with the lye on the hand was like a giant wink and everything made perfect sense. It hadn't crossed my mind to watch any film at all, and yet here I was watching the exact thing I needed to see. Weird how shit works like that.
And yeah, ever since then, these dreams.
