WashYourHands
Cat Malogen
hence printing T-shirts for our big night out all together, a memento
25 years of WANG!
- Thread starter Mr. Tea
- Start date
hence printing T-shirts for our big night out all together, a memento
Mr. Tea
Let's Talk About Ceps
Anyway, just to reiterate. Your options for April 20 are:
- turn up, apologise for being the most embarrassing person on the internet 2023, and we'll bury the hatchet - if you ask nicely I might even stop bumming your dead dad;
- turn up, fight me man to man, and get demolished by a stronger, fitter, younger man who hasn't ruined himself with years of alcohol and drug abuse - I will naturally press charges for the unprovoked assault all the same, and will ask for the multiple death threats to be taken into account, which are a criminal offence with a maximum tariff of ten years in themselves;
- turn up, attack me at unawares or while I'm already wasted like a pathetic coward, go to prison, and ruin your life;
- or don't turn up at all, and be confirmed as the biggest pussyhole in existence.
- turn up, apologise for being the most embarrassing person on the internet 2023, and we'll bury the hatchet - if you ask nicely I might even stop bumming your dead dad;
- turn up, fight me man to man, and get demolished by a stronger, fitter, younger man who hasn't ruined himself with years of alcohol and drug abuse - I will naturally press charges for the unprovoked assault all the same, and will ask for the multiple death threats to be taken into account, which are a criminal offence with a maximum tariff of ten years in themselves;
- turn up, attack me at unawares or while I'm already wasted like a pathetic coward, go to prison, and ruin your life;
- or don't turn up at all, and be confirmed as the biggest pussyhole in existence.
Mr. Tea
Let's Talk About Ceps
Great, see you there!
WashYourHands
Cat Malogen
Who is going to apologise to a miserable wretch like you
Regarding our Da - if you’d actually met the man, chatted, supped a few pints at his favourite haunts, gone to see Celtic every weekend with him and his cronies, chewed the fat with him about jazz et al, I would’ve been offended yet…
Yet, you never knew or met the man - his nicknames, his loves, passions, foibles, mistakes, regrets - so flaunting a deathbed scene didn’t affect anyone here the way you felt it might, apart from the sheer ott absurdity of you thinking it had any actual agency or purchase, beyond embarrassing yourself to the wider world
Keep edging closer to the precipice, by all means, i actively encourage it because you’ve proven stupid enough to leave an actual prosecutable trail
Summary, we all die @Mr. Tea you poor hapless cunt. Everyone. Everyone’s folks, your aunties and uncles, my surviving aunties and uncles, all our old mates, everyone we love eventually slides into infinite darkness. Hence, while you waste time worrying about your reaction score, what the future holds, the inherent margins of chance and peculiarities of fate and synchronicity around 420, I get to participate in debates which aren’t repetitively tedious and b-o-r-i-n-g
ps
Clinamenic
Binary & Tweed
You guys ssssssssuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucccccccccccccccccccckkkkkkkkkkkkk
WashYourHands
Cat Malogen
as Tea’s young apprentice I suggest you run now why you still have unroofied legs
WashYourHands
Cat Malogen
2 months out of the parental home means this is particularly vulnerable time for you
WashYourHands
Cat Malogen
An older wiser Cavanagh, you can do it
Mr. Tea
Let's Talk About Ceps
You literally can't help yourself making stupid, empty threats, can you?
Mr. Tea
Let's Talk About Ceps
Well I'm glad to see my post didn't in any way upset you or get to you at all. *infinite number of 'haha' emojis*
WashYourHands
Cat Malogen
Mr. Tea
Let's Talk About Ceps
Brutal.
WashYourHands
Cat Malogen
Mr. Tea
Let's Talk About Ceps
Oh lol, I've just actually read your lachrymose self-pitying bullshit here, and have just come across this hilarious bit of self-delusion.
You'd really go crying to the cops about my 'ableist language', when you've literally made death threats, that could earn you ten years inside? Are you really so touched in the head that you think that'd turn out well for you?
You're not so squeaky clean in that regard yourself, anyway, are you?
There really is no depth of utter fucking idiocy you won't stoop to, is there? How much more humiliation do you want to heap on yourself? Why not quit while you're.... well, hardly 'ahead' exactly, but before you make things even worse for yourself, I mean.
Mr. Tea
Let's Talk About Ceps
I shall revisit it when Wash turns up and, like, totally decks me, and then, when the security people are about to bundle him to the ground, says "But this is Mr. Tea, the most heinous man ever to use the internet!", and scrolls through his phone to show them a few choice misdemeanours of mine, at which point everyone cheers loudly and carries him around on their shoulders.
He is eventually awarded an OBE for his services to the country, which he accepts just in order to get to the king at the awards ceremony, at which point he will yell "Death to the English! Up the Provvo's!", and karate-kick the king's head off.
He is eventually awarded an OBE for his services to the country, which he accepts just in order to get to the king at the awards ceremony, at which point he will yell "Death to the English! Up the Provvo's!", and karate-kick the king's head off.
mixed_biscuits
_________________________
This is verbatim the feedback I received for my first essay at university.
Mr. Tea
Let's Talk About Ceps
Ah, they did proper teaching in those days.
WashYourHands
Cat Malogen
Things you might love thread really got to you pleading to management like a stuck pig, you get the gist comparing idiocy word searches
A man’s bestial insult about the dying pays a man’s price. Now, if some poor unfortunate personal event were to befall you, an incident where I was nowhere near, say while at work in the presence of colleagues or out with mates at any point now or in the future, you’ll never have time to say sorry for these interactions but I forgive you nonetheless:
I forgive your imbecilic ways
I forgive your parents for raising you so shockingly but will spare conjuring up their deathbeds
i forgive the void in your soul
i forgive your terrible jokes
i forgive your inflated but ltd range of severe rage, triumph over nothing and constant self-abasement
i forgive your Biscuits ‘debates’ resolving nothing
i forgive your rhetorical questions and strokey chin emojis
I forgive your persona as a construct of deeply held insecurities and quiet despair carved out online over 25+ years, ie the long arc in the development of “Mr Tea“, online masochistic presence extraordinaire
i forgive the frustrations driving your impudence
i forgive the parts in your personality which necessitate the need in you to be approved of and shamed publicly in the same breath/sentence
I forgive these parts which have served a purpose protecting you - there are no bad parts - trying to both shield yourself and please your own father in an entangled cycle of pun co-dependency
The best choice you can make for your son - and I say this father to father - is to break the cycle, get help and try repairing the ruptures in your own core self-beliefs
No Bad Parts: Healing Trauma and Restoring Wholeness wi…
Discover an empowering new way of understanding your mu…
Equally, if you were to impinge on the fun of our green t-shirts at Wang, I can’t control everyone just looking for a night out in the big smoke with old friends now can I
If you desire an actual organised pugilistic outcome, if you really want to do this, ok. You’re not getting curb stomped in public. No £ waged, 3 x 3 minute rounds, any boxing club will host with fair notice and a donation towards their youth gear. Let one of the lads know and it’s done, henceforth you’re on perma-ignore within threads
Mr. Tea
Let's Talk About Ceps
It was definitely worth "bullying" me that time, wasn't it? Look how much you're enjoying yourself.Things you might love thread really got to you pleading to management like a stuck pig, you get the gist comparing idiocy word searches
A man’s bestial insult about the dying pays a man’s price. Now, if some poor unfortunate personal event were to befall you, an incident where I was nowhere near, say while at work in the presence of colleagues or out with mates at any point now or in the future, you’ll never have time to say sorry for these interactions but I forgive you nonetheless:
I forgive your imbecilic ways
I forgive your parents for raising you so shockingly but will spare conjuring up their deathbeds
i forgive the void in your soul
i forgive your terrible jokes
i forgive your inflated but ltd range of severe rage, triumph over nothing and constant self-abasement
i forgive your Biscuits ‘debates’ resolving nothing
i forgive your rhetorical questions and strokey chin emojis
I forgive your persona as a construct of deeply held insecurities and quiet despair carved out online over 25+ years, ie the long arc in the development of “Mr Tea“, online masochistic presence extraordinaire
i forgive the frustrations driving your impudence
i forgive the parts in your personality which necessitate the need in you to be approved of and shamed publicly in the same breath/sentence
I forgive these parts which have served a purpose protecting you - there are no bad parts - trying to both shield yourself and please your own father in an entangled cycle of pun co-dependency
The best choice you can make for your son - and I say this father to father - is to break the cycle, get help and try repairing the ruptures in your own core self-beliefs
No Bad Parts: Healing Trauma and Restoring Wholeness wi…
Discover an empowering new way of understanding your mu…www.goodreads.com
Equally, if you were to impinge on the fun of our green t-shirts at Wang, I can’t control everyone just looking for a night out in the big smoke with old friends now can I
If you desire an actual organised pugilistic outcome, if you really want to do this, ok. You’re not getting curb stomped in public. No £ waged, 3 x 3 minute rounds, any boxing club will host with fair notice and a donation towards their youth gear. Let one of the lads know and it’s done, henceforth you’re on perma-ignore within threads