noel emits

a wonderful wooden reason
You mean like a lie / stress detection thing?

For some reason I hadn't imagined that that sort of thing was in widespread usage.
 

Martin Dust

Techno Zen Master
You mean like a lie / stress detection thing?

For some reason I hadn't imagined that that sort of thing was in widespread usage.

Yeah, they use it all the time - I did some work with the guy who came up with the software for the Police, you can tell when they have it on cos they keep going over the same thing again and again hoping to catch people out.
 

Mr. Tea

Let's Talk About Ceps
Yeah, they use it all the time - I did some work with the guy who came up with the software for the Police, you can tell when they have it on cos they keep going over the same thing again and again hoping to catch people out.

I'd have thought that would be a fairly standard police interrogation technique, special voice software or no.
 

zhao

there are no accidents
corporate and hollywood copy bugs me to no end. only 2 examples come to mind right now:

artok or artoc or whatever that company is called:

the art of investment, the art of creativity...

WHAT?!?!?!

that movie from the 80s, The Vanishing, tagline is

Obsession is the Ultimate Weapon

make angry baby ANGRY!!!!

angry_baby_head.jpg
 
Last edited:

Mr. Tea

Let's Talk About Ceps
Pfft..."Obsession is the Ultimate Weapon" reminds me of a film that came out a couple of years ago with the strapline "In war, the greatest weapon is seduction". Um, actually I think you'll find BIG FUCK-OFF BOMBS are the greatest weapon in war, followed by BIG FUCK-OFF GUNS. 'Seduction' would be quite far down my list, to be honest.
 

zhao

there are no accidents
Pfft..."Obsession is the Ultimate Weapon" reminds me of a film that came out a couple of years ago with the strapline "In war, the greatest weapon is seduction". Um, actually I think you'll find BIG FUCK-OFF BOMBS are the greatest weapon in war, followed by BIG FUCK-OFF GUNS. 'Seduction' would be quite far down my list, to be honest.

well at least Seduction CAN be a weapon, not so much "Obsession"...

most of her ideas are entirely out of date or just fucked, but Ayn Rand got one thing right: when people act as a committee bad bad things happen.
 

john eden

male pale and stale
1) Anything involving 6 hour train rides, camping, rain, flu and wankers.

2) People who say things like

when people act as a committee bad bad things happen.

without realising that this is essentially a criticism of democracy or any kind of collective working.

3) Getting clamped for parking outside my own flat.

4) People who say things like "I hate travelling on buses because I don't want to be surrounded by people who can only afford to travel on buses".
 

Mr. Tea

Let's Talk About Ceps
3) Getting clamped for parking outside my own flat.

Had you forgotten your little permit thingy, or run out of them?

Parking enforcement is a total racket, it's all contracted out to private firms and the wardens often have quotas they have to fill.
 

john eden

male pale and stale
Had you forgotten your little permit thingy, or run out of them?

Parking enforcement is a total racket, it's all contracted out to private firms and the wardens often have quotas they have to fill.


I picked up the car the day before and was about to pack it before going on holiday. So no permit as I don't really own a car.

£120.

On holiday I read "Foxy T" by Tony White which features a violent encounter betweeen some yoots and some car clampers who have clamped someone for parking outside their own flat...
 

IdleRich

IdleRich
"I picked up the car the day before and was about to pack it before going on holiday. So no permit as I don't really own a car.
£120."
Exact same thing happened to me ages ago. Cunts.
Where I live now there was previously a clamping/towing company employed to patrol the grounds (to protect the residents obviously although the only people who ever got towed were residents who left their cars there after their permit had gone ten minutes out of date) but the freehold has changed hands and the residents now control it. First thing we did was fire the clamping company but their representatives have still turned up sniffing round the car park - they actually had to be told that they weren't employed there any more and that they had no jurisdiction or right to mess with any of the cars there regardless of whether or not they had a parking permit and, in short, to fuck off.

"On holiday I read "Foxy T" by Tony White which features a violent encounter betweeen some yoots and some car clampers who have clamped someone for parking outside their own flat..."
I read about one of those professional retired gangster types (Dave Courtney?) saying that once he decided to go into business selling wheel clamps which he acquired by leaving old bangers in places where they were bound to get clamped and then steeling the clamps when they appeared. Poetic justice I guess.
 

Mr. Tea

Let's Talk About Ceps
I read about one of those professional retired gangster types (Dave Courtney?) saying that once he decided to go into business selling wheel clamps which he acquired by leaving old bangers in places where they were bound to get clamped and then steeling the clamps when they appeared. Poetic justice I guess.

You mean, helping the wheel clamps brace themselves for a shock, or something? Oh, what an ironic spelling error.

Anyway, if you had your own clamp, and some means of (un)locking it, it'd be great to lure some clampers with a 'decoy' illegally-parked car and then clamp their van while they were occupied.
 
Last edited:

IdleRich

IdleRich
Oops.
But yeah, it would be better to clamp the clampers I guess. What exactly is the law regarding this scourge and how do they work? I guess that a council or whatever sells a licence to a private company to patrol their patch and they thus have an incentive to catch as many people as possible but what recourse do you have if you feel that you were unfairly clamped? How can it be legal for someone to just clamp you car even if the council has told them they can?
Same goes for bailiffs really, how do they work?
 

Mr. Tea

Let's Talk About Ceps
There must be an appeals process of some kind, but I expect it's so long and cumbersome the firms just bank on most people, even those who think they've been illegally clamped, simply paying up to avoid the hassle (not to mention the fact that the fine gets bigger the longer you leave it). Which would seem to go hand-in-hand with the practice some of them have of punishing wardens who fail to make a quota, thus forcing them to clamp or ticket legally-parked cars to make up the numbers.
 

straight

wings cru
finding out haringay station is one stop into zone 3 the first time i use the overground and get fined £20 because they still havent sorted this oyster card craic yet
 

zhao

there are no accidents
and come on john eden.

you have seen me time and again point out the primacy of symbiotic relationships in nature, versus Capitalism's propagandized lie of "universal competitiveness".

you have heard me condemn false interpretations and applications of Darwinian "natural selection" as moral justification for despicable selfishness and greed.

you have seen me extol the virtues of cooperation, and denounce many practices and ways of life having to do with consumerism and western 20th century construction of the individual.

and fachrissakes you have heard me go on and on about the underlying connectedness of everyone and everything under, above, around and beyond the sun, if one just looks beyond the illusory veil of separation...



but in the context of capitalism, in the context of hollywood and marketing, you have to agree that atrocious bullshit comes out of board meetings and PR firms.

it hurts me a little that you would interpret my light hearted joke as some stupid egotist statement.
 

STN

sou'wester
The fact that every youtube clip even remotely involving black people INVARIABLY has at least one depressing, racist comment under it.
 
Top