Christian Spam Thread

[Woebot]

Dedicated to Christian Spam

 

[Woebot]

I had an experience with God, Sept 2003, Jesus is Lord:

Short version:
God said,"Good News." then I recieved a Good News bible.


Long version:

I was down Pittsburgh, finishing up a day of work at Cargenie Mellon as I
was working as a computer consultant for the
Career Center. It was a pretty cool job. I'd write some software, modify
hardware, or just do some light work such as
deliver mail. I felt pretty much complete, after having a long hard time in
school. To finally be working was a great
feeling. I decided to go out for Sushi. At the Sushi place, I was seated in
front of an Aquarium where a single fish
swam. I thought on the situation that there was a specimen of beauty in
front of me, yet I'm going to be eating fish
soon. There was music playing which I think was Japanese. I finished my
food and tipped the waitress. Before I left, I
wished a Bob Marley song would play. The next song on the radio was a Bob
Marley song. I thought that was pretty cool.
So I left, and was walking back to work to check in and see if anyone
needed anything. While I was walking over a
bridge, I heard God say to me,"Good News". It was like a whisper, but it
came with authority. I had to understand what
it meant. I felt compelled to go straight to my car and drive. When I was
driving I felt as if I should go towards
home, and while I was driving, I felt unable to turn my eyes to look at
billboards or be distracted from the road. I
had an effect similar to tunnel vision where everything but what was
necessary for driving was being filtered out.
Eventually I passed my old church that I went to when I was young. My dad
was there doing maintaince on the graveyard.
I felt this is where I needed to go. I stepped inside the church and my dad
and I talked. We held hands while talking
and our arms were trembling. I don't think I mentioned being told the,"Good
News". He went upstairs and brought down a
Good News bible for me.


I don't claim to be a prophet,but I fully know God exists as explained in
the bible. I'm well educated, and I
appreciate science. But neither science, nor do fake religions detract
from the bible. If you read the bible, you'll
find truth.

 

[baboon2004]

The problem with Christian spam is that, unless it's of the "It's very nice to be in contact with you, but I didn't write to you to exchange pleasantries, I wrote to tell you about Jesus", or of the Old Testament hellfire and brimstone variety, then it can be quite boring.

 

[shykitten]

i had a spam-type encounter with a bible-basher in the high street today.

BB: "how are you today?"

SK: "errr... fine thanks. not really into God though, so... [backs away]"

BB: "why not?"

SK: [looking back while walking way] "well, she doesn't exist!"

BB: [looks incredulous] "...he!"

interesting that, given one momentary opportunity to argue the point, the guy's instinct was to assert God's male gender, rather than the metaphysical entity's existence.

 

[Rambler]

And there's always the blogpsot.com one - try any Blogger address, but with that mispelling. I've always wondered about that - is it trying to pretend that it's a sign from God, that He (She) has overtaken your browser in order to impart some message to you? (Rather than a lame cybersquatting scam).

 

[Grievous Angel]

For some reason I can't quite put my finger on, I don't get any Christian spam.

 

[sufi]

Hello, I hope you're doing well! I'm reaching out to see if you—or someone you know—might be interested in a piano I'm looking to rehome. It belonged to my late husband, and it meant a great deal to him, so I'm really hoping to find someone who will enjoy and appreciate it as much as he did. If you happen to know anyone who might be interested, I’d be so grateful if you could pass along my information. Thank you so much! Best wishes, Nelly.

🤷‍♂️

 

[william_kent]

🤷‍♂️

The legendary 'piano scam'

A PIANO scam affecting charities and schools has reached the borough.
A church has shared their experience with Wokingham Today to highlight the fraudsters’ methods.
Anyone receiving the offer of a free second hand piano should take note.
A borough church representative said: “I was sent an email from someone I know, forwarding a message they had been sent, and which they believed might be of interest.”
The message had come from a woman whose husband had passed away, saying that she had a three year old Yamaha grand piano she wanted to donate to a charity or church.
“My colleague had replied to find out more, and had been told that the instrument was still available,” the representative said.
“Our first thoughts were, wow! What a generous offer.”
“Such a piano could be worth thousands of pounds, and would have been a very considerable gift.
“Like many organisations, our piano has seen better days, so to receive such a kind message was very exciting.
“We asked if we could come and see the piano, which looked beautiful in the photograph.”
The donor explained that unfortunately the instrument had just gone into storage, but that the shipping company could be contacted to arrange delivery.
The church was asked to contact the company for a quote for the cost of delivery.
At this point alarm bells, rather than church bells, began to ring.
“Even if it were to cost a fraction of the price of a piano to have it delivered, I could never spend any of the church’s money on something I hadn’t actually seen,” said the representative.
“I brought the subject up at a group meeting, and another friend who serves on the board of governors at a borough school told me that they had received a similar email.”
The school had been warned about a piano scam to take payment for delivery of a non existent piano.
“Because the tone of the emails was very friendly and chatty, I had assumed that my colleague knew the sender, and was therefore less alert to the possibility that this might be a scam,” they continued.
“Messages were well written, just what you would expect to hear from someone making a generous gesture.
“Churches and charities are in danger of being attacked by these wicked people.
“We didn’t fall for it in the end, but others might not be so lucky.”
An online search for ‘piano scam’ reveals the extent of the problem.
People talk about receiving requests for payment via their phone or an App for the shipping fee.
The piano never arrives, and the website or email of the removal company is fake.
A this time the fraudsters’ story is that of a bereaved widow, although the tale may change and the piano model might vary from message to message.
But the warning is the same – don’t be fooled into paying for a piano you haven’t actually seen for yourself.
The scammers may well tell you that they are happy to donate their much loved relative’s piano to a good home, but the truth is that they are much happier to con you out of your charity or school’s money.

from

Don’t be played by piano scammers​

by "staff writer"