films you've seen recently and would NOT recommend

[craner]

I've been to the cinema twice this year and both times have been a complete disaster. The King's Speech was pure twaddle, not exactly pro-Windsor or anything so crass, but empty, reactionary sentimentalism nonetheless; apart from the joy of Helena Bonham-Carter's laser-sharp pronunciation, it was an irritating thing, a film with all sorts of subtle and not-so subtle designs on you. But this was nothing in comparison to The Kids Are Alright which seemed to me so confused, chippy, smug, ignorant and psychologically violent that I left the cinema in a homophobic rage. Wild horses, as they say, would have to drag me to see Black Swan, and I'm starting to feel a bit iffy about Barney's Version and I would walk over water, as they say, just to gaze upon Rosamund Pike.

 

[outraygeous]

Why did I hate The Social Network?

I really didn't enjoy it at all yet the world seems to think it was amazing? I did think that M Zukerberg was a douche and gosh knows what was going on with the fake Napster creator in Justin Timberlake but just didn't get it.

I did watch Im Still Here which was alot better than the previous film. Contrived at points with the reflective moments and the camera being there but was much more interesting than watching a film about a guy stealing and idea and then shafting his only mate

 

[gumdrops]

i didnt like im still here. too much 'dude isnt this just fucking HILARIOUS' in-jokery. i like phoenix and think hes a really good actor but not that much to care about a fake meltdown.

i saw confessions, this japanese film about how nasty kids can be these days. it starts off pretty good and interesting, but then you realise the weedy/generic indie soundtrack is never going to end (this really bugged me the most i think, as it seemed to be playing for about 85% of the film, plus they had a radiohead song which just made things a bit parodic), and neither is the voiceover. bit too absorbed in its own bleakness, and it tries to make it all beautiful and sad but it feels a bit cliche/too knowing. basically made me think of hollywood indie and films too caught up in their own importance like crash or babel except its more tedious (the same story told from diff characters' angles, but not distinctly enough - it could prob have ended after the first half hour and it would have been quite ok). sort of a shame though cos the basic idea and themes are interesting - child gets killed, mum is out to take it out on the kids responsible - but the splashes of dark humour/spite just get smothered in over earnestness.

 

[baboon2004]

i thought i'm still here would be great, but..it was really boring, wasn't it? Fast forwarded through some of it.

 

[gumdrops]

submarine. didnt hate it but i almost did. just cos i hate wes anderson. and this film was like wes anderson if he was british. so i didnt like it. not going to pay attention to overhyped british films anymore. and there were too many songs with alex turner singing on them. when i saw the poster saying he had some songs in it i didnt think id have to hear quite so many of them.

 

[empty mirror]

The Social Network had the worst CGI snow I've ever seen. Extremely distracting. Movie blew donkey D.

Watched Enemy at the Gates with Jude Law (at my house, we're tight) and it was very odd. Star Wars-ish CGI Stukas, theatrical sniping, and the strangest sex scene in mainstream cinema (a hyperbole, but really, it was supposed to be the culmination of the love interest storyline, but the actress played the scene like Jude Law's character Vassily Zaytsev [legendary Russian sniper] was HUUUUUGE or he was in the wrong hole - her reaction was what Bush II would call "shock and awe" - inviting the viewer to imagine the worst kind of devastation, sexual death from above). Brutal. Also, the film had strange expositional sections that played like a high school social studies film strip, complete with a map showing H*tler's conquest of Europe as an ever-increasing shadow enveloping the continents. This one sucked a couple donkey d's pr0n style.

 

[baboon2004]

submarine. didnt hate it but i almost did. just cos i hate wes anderson. and this film was like wes anderson if he was british. so i didnt like it. not going to pay attention to overhyped british films anymore. and there were too many songs with alex turner singing on them. when i saw the poster saying he had some songs in it i didnt think id have to hear quite so many of them.

Pity, cos I really like Richard Ayoade.

I hate Wes Anderson too, I think - Royal Tenenbaums is one of the worst films I have ever seen.

 

[gumdrops]

it has some redeeming elements - its not shit - but its just too knowing with its whimsy/innocence to really be as loveable as a film like this should be imo. but yeah, i hated the royal tenenbaums too. awful film. stiller is exec producer or something on submarine funnily enough.

 

[bandshell]

The Killing Fields

 

[IdleRich]

"I hate Wes Anderson too, I think - Royal Tenenbaums is one of the worst films I have ever seen."

Thirded.
I think I'll still give Submarine a go though for some reason even though I keep seeing this comparison being made.

 

[gumdrops]

its got some good duffle coats in it.

 

[craner]

I've seen Submarine and I agree with what was said up there, but I would like to point out that it has some lovely shots of Barry Island throughout, and also, you know, it's not unfunny. I got a bit annoyed with a Kate Muir review persistently stating that it was set in Swansea. I know journalists are supposed to pretend they know what they're talking about, but still -- that is not Swansea Bay and that is not an easy mistake to make.

 

[baboon2004]

I've seen Submarine and I agree with what was said up there, but I would like to point out that it has some lovely shots of Barry Island throughout, and also, you know, it's not unfunny. I got a bit annoyed with a Kate Muir review persistently stating that it was set in Swansea. I know journalists are supposed to pretend they know what they're talking about, but still -- that is not Swansea Bay and that is not an easy mistake to make.

The setting was the one thing aside from the director's past work (albeit in comedy acting) that would make me go to see it. Seems that reason has been chalked off, sort of...

 

[mistersloane]

Thirded.
I think I'll still give Submarine a go though for some reason even though I keep seeing this comparison being made.

Fourthded. I want to give Wes Anderson and all of his friends diarrhoea.

 

[mekalaka]

I don't like Wes Anderson's movies either.
What never fails to make me uncomfortable is to witness the knowing looks and smiles that people who are fans of his movies bear, when they mention them. They seem to think that those movies are the exemplification of subtlety.
Slightly excruciating.

 

[IdleRich]

Same goes for Lost In Translation. I hate that film in the same way for its smugness.

 

[Sick Boy]

Same goes for Lost In Translation. I hate that film in the same way for its smugness.

Yeah, although this film has some nice moments, it breaks time tested narrative devices for seemingly no reason or purpose at all. There is hardly any kind of story arc - in fact, pretty much nothing happens. It's almost impossible to care about anything that is happening. I'm sure it comes down to whatever Sofia Coppola's artistic aspirations were, but the end product just comes off like total contempt for the audience.

 

[craner]

Loving long shots of Scarlett Johansson doesn't suggest total contempt for the audience.

 

[Corpsey]

Loving long shots of Scarlett Johansson doesn't suggest total contempt for the audience.

I think this is what made it work for me. I was on pills at the time of watching it, so it worked particularly well ('From Hell' which I watched the same night/morning, didn't work on pills).

Viz. smug films - 'Vicky Cristiana Barcelona'. One of the most irritating films I've ever seen. Again, got past critical faculties by hitting me with a Lopez/Johansson double low-blow.

As for films I don't recommend watching - Lethal Weapon 3. It's a horrible step-down in quality after the first two, which were both barnstorming, but not barn-nuking, as L.W.3 is. Danny Glover has got to be one of the worst actors I can be bothered to think of as I'm typing this.

 

[Corpsey]

Which makes me wonder - do films that are so bad they're enjoyable belong in this thread, or the other thread?

Cos I kinda put Lethal Weapon 1 and 2 in the other thread.