Addiction
- Thread starter baboon2004
- Start date
mistadubalina
Banned
When did you know you were addicted ? Like was there a recognizable cross over point from casual user to junkie ? Is it delusional or denial to keep thinking you got a handle on it ? and was it a staircasing thing from mild drugs to harder stuff to keep gettin the highest high ?
I have this love hate thing with cigarettes, but i can get it under control anytime. Thing is i like smoking yet can also go weeks without them. Depends on the company i keep. If i'm around smokers i smoke , if i'm not i dont.
ok that was pretty ridiculous and unnecessary. actually "completely" is more like it.
i understood what Nomad meant with the "men who consume too much porn become unable to relate", but can also understand how someone else might see that as a polarizing compartmentalization of all men into 2 rigid categories.
nomad said that to make a point about the dynamic of over dependence on representation; i don't think she really thinks that all men belong in 2 categories. but i can see how someone can read it as such.
how it escalated from there i have no fucking idea. but insinuating that Baboon might not be honest about his ability to relate to women in bed was unnecessary, and similarly calling Nomad a liar about her own life was out of line. there are no examples of either of you being knowingly untruthful.
maybe just you both are a bit sensitive right now? but really there was no need for any of that. why don't you say something nice to each other and we'll go on as it is an interesting conversation, and it was really a small bump which turned into a hill...
i understood what Nomad meant with the "men who consume too much porn become unable to relate", but can also understand how someone else might see that as a polarizing compartmentalization of all men into 2 rigid categories.
nomad said that to make a point about the dynamic of over dependence on representation; i don't think she really thinks that all men belong in 2 categories. but i can see how someone can read it as such.
how it escalated from there i have no fucking idea. but insinuating that Baboon might not be honest about his ability to relate to women in bed was unnecessary, and similarly calling Nomad a liar about her own life was out of line. there are no examples of either of you being knowingly untruthful.
maybe just you both are a bit sensitive right now? but really there was no need for any of that. why don't you say something nice to each other and we'll go on as it is an interesting conversation, and it was really a small bump which turned into a hill...
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baboon2004
Darned cockwombles.
The voice of reason, and fair enough too. Internet arguments are horrible things.
I apologise for insinuating (or indeed saying) that Nomad might not be truthful about her own life. That was indeed unnecessary.
But I stand by everything else I said, and she is confused about who she is talking to (any evidence to the contrary is gladly received, and i will be quite willing to admit it if I have forgotten a conversation she is referring to - the reference to some ecstasy quote I didn't make is still baffling me).
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baboon2004
Darned cockwombles.
Aaaaaaaarrrggggghhhh! What's the point?
As for your other comment - who questioned that you were a recovering addict? I certainly never did or would do that.
As for working with people who operate further outside the norms of society than you have done, I work within the prison system. 'Nuff said.
Edit: This comment was posted prior to the one 'before' - dunno what happened there...
baboon2004
Darned cockwombles.
Anyways, my point was simply that being very visual sexually-speaking doesn't preclude also being very tactile. I didn't even mention sexual prowess! I just, er, like touching things.
Moving away from porn, has anyone experience (themselves or people they know) of what they might term sexual addiction, in the sense of obsessively pursuing short, destructive sexual relationships? From what I have seen, the problem reaches crazy proportions amongst gay men, presumably due to the easier availability of casual sex - a boyfriend of a close friend of mine had apparently slept with over 1000 people, which blew my head off (no double meaning at all intended) when my friend told me. Now THAT'S self-destructive behaviour...
Moving away from porn, has anyone experience (themselves or people they know) of what they might term sexual addiction, in the sense of obsessively pursuing short, destructive sexual relationships? From what I have seen, the problem reaches crazy proportions amongst gay men, presumably due to the easier availability of casual sex - a boyfriend of a close friend of mine had apparently slept with over 1000 people, which blew my head off (no double meaning at all intended) when my friend told me. Now THAT'S self-destructive behaviour...
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Mr. Tea
Let's Talk About Ceps
Agreed entirely.
Ditto. Being touched is good too.
Edit: for the record I'd like to point out that baboon is excellent in bed.
Edit edit: I just glanced at this post and read 'touched' as 'douched'.
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wow i didn't know that. when i met you i seem to remember you saying something vague about being in an office all day (but i was also drunk) what exactly do you do? if you don't mind talking about it.
i was in the LA county prison for 3 days once... seemed like 3 months. a nightmare you wake up TO. and in those 3 days i saw and experienced so much: grown ass muscle bound badman crying like a little girl... solitary confinement (for a night)... worse than any depiction in films.
baboon2004
Darned cockwombles.
Oh, I work for a small advisory service - I'm not an adviser myself, but this morning for example I was answering calls cos none of my colleagues were around. But the stories I've heard and the letters I've read blow my mind.
My colleague worked in the States, and from what he says the system is much tougher there - but maybe he's referring to the penitentiaries? Though I'm sure LA county jail is horrible...
Yeah, segregation units/solitary confinement must be a mindfuck. Especially if (as often) unmerited.
What strikes me is how nice most of the prisoners I've been in contact with are, and how damaged so many of them are (meant in a factual rather than pejorative sense).
baboon2004
Darned cockwombles.
Oh, that beautiful drunken, passionate night...
nomadthethird
more issues than Time mag
T, all guys are visual, from what I can tell and what science says, and I'm not trying to take that away from them. But sometimes--and I've seen it in my personal life, but read a lot about this too--guys who spend all their time looking at porn, to the point of addiction, can't really get into real life sex. They're sort of distractible or far away or something ime.
I know most guys use some kind of porn when they're not getting much action, and I don't blame them really. Since I'm not visual, I don't need that kind of thing so I guess it's easier for me.
I actually like the aesthetic of Japanese bondage porn, though, if I may say so. There are some good artists/photogs who work with bondage over there. It's less cheesy than American porn.
But anyway, Baboon--I'm sorry, but you have to understand that it's not even easy for me to remember last summer, let alone talk about it. I really probably shouldn't have, and that's my own fault. But Zhao is right, I am having a pretty shitty week, so let's not get in pointless arguments about stuff, I'm just not in the mood. If I make a big deal out of something in my life, it's because I don't have many good things going for me and that's all I have.
Also, I was thinking about it and I vaguely remember there was another guy with your same avatar pic that I might be confusing you with? Not sure, but it's possible.
I know most guys use some kind of porn when they're not getting much action, and I don't blame them really. Since I'm not visual, I don't need that kind of thing so I guess it's easier for me.
I actually like the aesthetic of Japanese bondage porn, though, if I may say so. There are some good artists/photogs who work with bondage over there. It's less cheesy than American porn.
But anyway, Baboon--I'm sorry, but you have to understand that it's not even easy for me to remember last summer, let alone talk about it. I really probably shouldn't have, and that's my own fault. But Zhao is right, I am having a pretty shitty week, so let's not get in pointless arguments about stuff, I'm just not in the mood. If I make a big deal out of something in my life, it's because I don't have many good things going for me and that's all I have.
Also, I was thinking about it and I vaguely remember there was another guy with your same avatar pic that I might be confusing you with? Not sure, but it's possible.
nomadthethird
more issues than Time mag
I escaped being arrested by a narrow margin a couple of times--thank god, because I can't even imagine what holding is like in Brooklyn let alone LA.
I used to know these kids who would get arrested by filing assault charges on each other, because in holding you can sell drugs for about 10 times what you get on the street for them. So they'd go, sell a bunch of drugs, then drop the charges on each other and leave. (they were teenagers, neighbors not really friends, mind you)
mistadubalina
Banned
Not happy, changed your mind or was that a lie and dont tell me youve gone back to deleting posts to make others look foolish...
...its not a good look eh
hey, back off.
it's something that i had NO IDEA about until it actually happened to me. all the movies and stories ain't shit compared to the real experience... amazing. amazingly brutal and dehumanizing. from the strip naked and get hosed down with high pressure water to the 5+ hours of waiting for your number to get called, to the refrigerator isolation room where i did push-ups and jogged in place all night to keep from freezing... my god i can not even imagine 3 months... or 3 years! or 30!! it's pure torture.
swears
preppy-kei
I have an oral fixation that drives people crazy. I spend all day sucking or chewing half the contents of our stationary cupboard at work, sometimes actually ordering stuff that looks good to mangle in my mouth. I went through one of those plastic casio digital watches every month as a teenager by taking it off and chewing the strap until it was a lumpy mess. I go through three packets of "Airwaves" gum every day. It always feels like there's something else I need to cram into my mouth, it's so satisfying.
nomadthethird
more issues than Time mag
Mista, I would no longer like to talk about my person struggle with addiction in public. If you'd like to discuss it with me via email, PM me and I'll be glad to talk with you.
Otherwise, fuck off.
nomadthethird
more issues than Time mag
And no, I haven't deleted any posts. I don't know what you're talking about.
nomadthethird
more issues than Time mag
Yeah, but at least they changed the Rockefeller laws finally!!! Did you read about that? Apparently it's caused quite a lot of people to lose their jobs. Prison is a huge industry, especially in rural areas.
nomadthethird
more issues than Time mag
In the U.S. there are state and federal pens. Most petty drug offenses will get you time in the state pen, which can be bad (Attica, e.g., I think is a state pen), but are nowhere near as bad as federal prison. If you bring drugs across state lines, that counts as "trafficing", which gets you a federal sentence usually.
On top of that, they use "intent to distribute" scales to decide what amount of drugs constitutes more than a "personal use" amount...so if you happen to be carrying more than a certain amount of cocaine (I think you usuallyget "intent" with an ounce), for example, you will be prosecuted as if you are a drug dealer, even if you are just an addict who buys in bulk. This has created a huge problem. Especially because in the 80s, during the crack epidemic, they set the "intent" scale really low for crack--so you could have just a few rocks on you, enough for a few hits, and be prosecuted for intent and sent to jail. This was considered a really racist law (called the Rockefeller laws), because it sent so many inner-city black men to prison, some of the even got LIFE for possessing a few ounces of crack.
Edit: the Rockefeller laws are blamed for flooded the prison system and burdening tax payers heavily
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