Tentative Andy
I'm in the Meal Deal
This is the hardest thing of all, isn't it? 

yes.
must remember to watch this (was on today, Telegraph link came up to day).
but what hope is there for the rest of us, if these guys cannot keep it together?
(the link title really says it all)
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/...rsity-Challenge-winners-go-on-to-failure.html
"Tony Gillham, who won the show in 2003 with Birkbeck College, spent the following four years as an alcoholic. He was drinking heavily while competing in the programme. "The best victory we ever had was when I had 16 rum and blacks the night before. I was incredibly dehydrated, I stank of booze and I was still completely drunk when I got in front of the cameras."
You mean in a remembering important stuff kind of way or "Oh fuck, I think I'm going nuts" kind of way?
Hmm, not really either, though maybe it feels like the latter sometimes. But what I meant was (a) the effort to come up with decent, satisfying answers to all the important questions I've asked myself about the world and especially (b) the difficulty in making these answers coherent with each other, finding some connection between them and avoiding any contradictions. For example, I'm not sure if my views on politics and my views on music match up with each other. Can they match up? Should they match up? It's a cliche, but the older I get the less I'm really sure that I know about anything.
Does anyone else (like me) think that actually they have a reasonabley coherant worldview? I should add that it has nothing to do with happiness.
but that's partly why you have reason and politics in the first place: so you don't go around shoplifting fancy desserts or decking your housemates for not buying bog roll.
Yeah I agree, but I don't think this clashes with having a worldview that makes sense. I would say any worldview must always be provisional in some sense, if it's not to be dogmatic.I don't think you should be afraid of changing your mind on things.
as i get older i get more and more unsure, i look back at former selves and think "what a clueless twat!".. i'm not even sure i believe what i've just written really.