dissensus on polling day
luke will put a cross in the box for corbyn-the cross of course an allusion to christ's crucifix- before purple smoke will from his cape and he'll disappear once more to his shamanic watchtower.
tea will spend the day outside the polling station encouraging passers by to vote labour before going home late at night and rewarding himself with a big warm bole of flatulent casserole
eden won’t vote, but will instead spend the day making a real difference by dropping supplies off at his local food bank, volunteering at the soup kitchen and acting as a white saviour surrogate father figure to wayward teens at his local youth centre (he gets his message across by speaking their language; “some tings are difficult my yout, but dem worth it for the greater good” he’ll tell them)
vim will walk past the polling station wearing a black trench coat and cracked leather boots, smelling of cigars and gruffly muttering about this assinine ceremony propping up the moribund, failing liberal democracy. as he walks past he will- for brief moment- turn and look through the window of the polling station with twinkling naivete in his eye ; a voice in his head he thought long dead will excitedly tell him to vote! for labour! for the many not the few! for a kindler gentler politics! but then a cough. no of course not he'll think to himself blushing. and away he'll walk, alone in the rain.
version will turn up intending to vote for corbyn, but as he arrives he’ll see one of the women manning the polling station drinking from a jug. “is it filtered?” he’ll enquire before becoming enveloped in an hours long, in depth examination of all things water filters, forgetting the whole reason he was there in the first place.
corpse will intend to go and vote only to end up back at home, naked with a sainsbury’s tuna sandwhich in one hand and his semi-erect cock in the other watching youtube compilation of hot cheryl cole pics.
driod will understandably feel enragingly impotent in ireland, so spend his day doing the rounds on old drum and bass forums chastising those who won’t vote for corbyn as “petulant swines” and “febrile knob goblins” and the like.
danny l is actually running as an mp for the durham white helmets, so will naturally vote for himself. best of luck to him
craner’s going to vote with a quill.