Facebook status thread

[Mr. Tea]

That sounds like basically the worst thing ever.

 

[IdleRich]

"I dunno, I think Tom just said it was very prevalent on the TV and radio, like you'd go into a bar and that's what would be playing on the telly."

Yeah but what kind of bar?

 

[Mr. Tea]

Oh, I don't know. Shit ones, probably.

 

[Mr. Tea]

"Dave why are u such a balled cunt can some one open a window and let some hair in plz have."

Are you...friends with this person?

 

[Local Authority]

Gid Stott
May 17
exams done - boom! More excited for Eurovision tomorrow...

 

[Local Authority]

Gid Stott
February 19
“Throughout life people will make you mad, disrespect you and treat you bad. Let God deal with the things they do, cause hate in your heart will consume you too.” - Will Smith (legend)

Gid Stott
February 6
wants to be on an island, with a hammock and a bacon sandwhich

Gid Stott
August 1, 2012
Something like 30 kids in tramps became Christians tonight - praise the Lord!

 

[Local Authority]

James Cooper
Breakfast In Bed. Thanks Mum.

Daphne D'Arcy (ex girlfriend of mine there)
what is spain?

Harli Joyce
when you're on the bus hungover and all you want it to do is stop moving

Sammy Anouer
Omg?

Leanne Teresa Channell
Considering going to get a psychic reading, it really intrigues mee..

Rob Leybourne
The new Giff Gaff advert is absolutely feckin class! Thought I was watching rude tube, only realising at the end it was their new zombie style advert!

Carla Louise GregoryRob Leybourne
Maybe not smarter than me but definitely gorgeous x
Like · · 13 hours ago near Amersham ·

Rob Leybourne The fact you had to ask me how to spell definitely to write this post speaks for itself! Lol x
12 hours ago via mobile · Like

Carla Louise Gregory Waaaaaah. X
12 hours ago via mobile · Like

Carla Louise Gregory
My gorgeous man is so much smarter than me xxx

Jimmy Asquith
Burger Rave vs You're Off Your Tits Mate

Rob Leybourne
Everyone seems really down Well on the plus side people I had a pretty darn swell day, had a laugh, made lotsa dollaaa and have been home, warm and toasted for a lil while now Happy chappy!!!

Sammy Anouer
be around croydon tonight all my bitches holla!

Connor Barnard
Go on dodger punch the little cunts head in!

Chris Stone
Need to stop eating Big Mac and double cheeses and these times of the morning

 

[Local Authority]

Jack Otm Manhood
People tryna fit in but I stand out..

Jahan K Otto
Monday
can anyone else not see an irony that the edl are organised enough to rally on a bank holiday monday? why waste you BHM?!

Jahan K Otto
May 25
2 elements alone not quite enough
to know that when the 2 combine to 1
resilient, fate intertwined
destined to collide

Jahan K Otto shared a link.
May 24
sorry for being a nob to the people i've been a nob to. hopefully this octopus stuck to a dolphin's genitalia will make up for it

Jahan K Otto
February 20
found 5p in the shower things are on the up!

Jahan K Otto
February 7
no, i don't think you're boring because you don't do drugs, i think you're boring because you've had a sheltered life, nothing interesting to say, no opinion on anything important AND you're a fucking SHEEP


Jahan K Otto
October 23, 2012
pokemon started off my wide vocabulary...

how many other 4 year old kids would know what

leer
hydro (pump)
ember
aurora (beam)
smog
toxic
solar (beam)
leech (seed/life)
or
seismic (toss)

meant? am i the only one?

also Venonat is butterfree's original pre-evolution, but they added the Caterpee and Metapod last minute

I know.. I know

 

[luka]

i just sent friend requests to all those people

 

[luka]

Danny Dyer
Thursday via Mobile
I saw a fly in an spiders web today haha #urfucked

 

[Local Authority]

go for it lol

William Shishi Smithee
Lool I just said 'brilliant' to someone looooool

 

[Patrick Swayze]

i just sent friend requests to all those people

looool

 

[Phaedo]

Slippery Bugger
isnt murry scotish

 

[Mr. Tea]

A woman I vaguely know - who is as close in age to my parents as she is to me - was in a relationship for a few months over this summer/autumn which has recently ended. For the past couple of weeks she has been posting a more or less continuous and extremely in-depth emotional autopsy on said relationship via Facebook, for all to see. I mean, I can only assume she's defriended him or vice-versa, but they must know a fair few people in common. She's American and takes gushing hyper-honesty to a level I've not seen outside of Jerry Springer.

There's wearing your heart on your sleeve, and then there's running up to strangers in the street, shoving your sleeve in their face and saying "HAY, DOES THIS HEART LOOK A BIT NEEDY AND DEMONSTRATIVE TO YOU, OR IS IT JUST ME?".

Never mind, with this behaviour I'm sure she'll have suitors lined up around the block in no time.