Martin Dust
Techno Zen Master
Rufus Wainwright
Bless
- Thread starter Martin Dust
- Start date
nomadthethird
more issues than Time mag
Getting pulled over three times in one week and somehow magically escaping a ticket each time.
Wait... you can own a car in New York?
nomadthethird
more issues than Time mag
I don't own one, I just use my mom's old van. But I'm not in Brooklyn right now (I'm upstate)... won't be going back until August.
This is my problem. I learned to drive mostly in Brooklyn, where there are no traffic rules. And now these upstate "state troopers" are pulling me over left and right.
nomadthethird
more issues than Time mag
I do know lots of people who own cars in New York though. If you don't live in Manhattan (where it costs literally hundreds a month to park in those garages), you can usually find free parking.
mos dan
fact music
Your girlfriend finding a condom wrapper in your bedroom that actually doesn't belong to you at all and trying to explain that.
Thank you God.
oh MATE. did you manage to do so? so larry david, that situation.
Mr. Tea
Let's Talk About Ceps
Your girlfriend finding a condom wrapper in your bedroom that actually doesn't belong to you at all and trying to explain that.
Thank you God.
My girlfriend once found another woman's knickers in my bedroom. I genuinely have no idea how they got there, although the fact that four of my housemates are women, one of whom has a girlfriend who stays over quite a lot, makes laundry-room mistakes virtually unavoidable from time to time.
You're telling me. Incredibly, I did. It was tough though, because you end up trying to convince yourself since anything you say in defence being innocent is pretty much exactly what you'd say being guilty.
I tell you what though the second the words "condom wrapper" left her mouth, time slowed down to about a year a second while my brain whipped through every single time I'd ever been drunk for the last year. Then, after a panoply of mental stills of me infuriating and embarassing myself and many others in a colourful variety of ways I could satsifactorily answer:
"IswearI'veneverseenthatbeforeinmyfuckinglife"
The upside is someone is going to have a nasty April Fool's this year.
Well the answer to that should be fairly obvious I think. I don't use 'em.
You can see my predicament.
That should've been the easiest thing to explain ever then!
Hold on a minute, actually not.
"Oh don't worry they are just my room mate's!"
nomadthethird
more issues than Time mag
If I were you, I would have just looked up, blankly, and said "hmm I have no idea where that came from. So-and-so slept here the other night, it must have been his..." The lack of defensiveness probably would count for a lot.
End of story.
Makes it a little easier, I think, that you don't usually use condoms. Because why would you start with someone else? Most women are on the pill anyhow.
End of story.
Makes it a little easier, I think, that you don't usually use condoms. Because why would you start with someone else? Most women are on the pill anyhow.
Tentative Andy
I'm in the Meal Deal
A blessing for - when you come down the steps in the subway station and the train you're after pulls up at the platform right then. Not when you have to run or anything - when you're just dawdling along minding your own business and by sheer coincidence your arrival matches that of the train.
Tentative Andy
I'm in the Meal Deal
Also, on a totally different tangent, The Breaks by Kurtis Blow. Now that is a fucking tune.
Tentative Andy
I'm in the Meal Deal
Bwahaha, poshwank, haven't heard that one since school.
Mr. Tea
Let's Talk About Ceps
In retrospect, she was probably annoyed more because I'd just assumed they were hers, when in fact they clearly belonged to a woman with a considerably larger arse than hers.