BAD PUNS: Breaking News, Lies, Gossip, etc

[viktorvaughn]

My fave in Deptford was Fishcoteque. There's also a PVC shop in Portsmouth called Oh My Goth.

There was a balloon shop in Dunstable called Blow Jobs, just vile and tacky. Unsurprisingly they went bust.

Peep this hair-cutting place!

 

[hint]

Weed It And Reap!

 

[adruu]

There's a Mexican Restaraunt in Houston called Ninfa's...

I thought Ninfamaniacs would be a good slogan for their frequent customer program but I was flatly rejected.

 

[nomos]

i remember an ad in high times for a drug test 'aid' called Urine Luck

 

[nomos]

along the same lines and sort of punny, a 'garden and herb' shop near where i grew up had the post code P0T 2G0

 

[Mr. Tea]

If I were a political writer I don't think I'd be able to resist the temptation to call Tony Blair the 'Pry Minister' when talking about the surveillance culture.

 

[zhao]

just saw an Ace of Crates somewhere enroute to an exhibition... i wanted to check it out cuz maybe it's a great record shop but didn't have time... doubt it though.

 

[zhao]

i remember an ad in high times for a drug test 'aid' called Urine Luck

URINE trouble? URINE luck!

 

[Slothrop]

There's a furniture shop near me called Chester Draws. (I don't live anywhere near Chester.) And another slightly more upmarket one called Pinewood Studios.

The best unconfirmed ones I've heard are the Arab / Israeli cheese shop called Cheeses of Nazareth and the kebab van in Australia called Jason's Donner Van...

 

[hucks]

The best unconfirmed ones I've heard are the Arab / Israeli cheese shop called Cheeses of Nazareth and the kebab van in Australia called Jason's Donner Van...

Similarly unconfirmed but nonetheless great is Lino Ritchie. I think it's in Dublin somewhere.

 

[simon silverdollar]

for this festival that i helped organise last summer the sign for the dance tent read:

"now is the summer of our disco tent".

 

[Slothrop]

for this festival that i helped organise last summer the sign for the dance tent read:

"now is the summer of our disco tent".

Ha ha, that reminds me... there was an outdoors shop near us that once advertised a winter tent sale with "now is the winter of our discount tents".

 

[Mr. Tea]

Edit: I heard about a camping/outdoor supplies type shop that was seen with a sign in the window saying "Now is the winter of our discount tents". Puntastic.

Funny echo in here...

Also, this occurred to me today:

Q. What do you call an Iranian who's just spilled gravy down himself in a posh restaurant?

A. Ahmedinnerjacket!

 

[noel emits]

Better call Angus McCoatup the Scotts cloakroom attendant.

 

[Paqamaq]

Ha ha, that reminds me... there was an outdoors shop near us that once advertised a winter tent sale with "now is the winter of our discount tents".

"Now is the discount of our winter tents." Surely

 

[Mr. Tea]

I love stupid little jokes, as in the following exchance:

Me: "Sweet dreams"
Her: "You too"
Me: "Nah, that was Eurythmics, wasn't it?"
Her: *has a spirited attempt at kicking me out of bed*

I also like this two-part joke:

"A woman walks into a cocktail bar and asks for a 'double entrendre', so the barman gives her one.
A sound engineer walks in after her, so the barman gives him one, too."

 

[mos dan]

words... can't... express...

Driven Batty By Gay-Slur Bus Driver

 

[noel emits]

I'm disappointed there was nothing about blocking the bus driver's exit.

 

[Mr. Tea]

I just love the fact he was supposedly the 'best man': http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/north_yorkshire/6946640.stm
(makes you wonder how bad the worst man was...)

 

[tom pr]

I noticed this morning that there's a clothes shop on Baker Street with a sign that says 'WE WILL DYE FOR YOU'