Mother Nature has just evolved a flying pair of prominent balls. She's healing.

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martin

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I now live in an area where deer regularly bolt out of nowhere in front of cars and vans (my driving instructor’s warned me this might happen, and not to spaz out and swerve off the road if it does. It's also good training for brake reaction if a schoolkid runs out into the road clutching a munchy box). Saw a fresh dead Bambi by the roadside a couple of months ago. Nobody bothered to remove the cadaver: passed it the other day and it’s still there, looking like a rotten, damp welcome mat -it's decomposed into mulch. Weird, I thought its skull and ribs would be visible…maybe somebody took them for their mantelpiece?

Despite their reputation as cowards, there’s always one sheep who’s game for trotting over to the edge of the fence and noisily cussing me out as I walk past. I just think: “You’re better off with me than stuck in there!…see you in a pitta bread soon”. Haven’t worked out the colour scheme but I think it means “for the chopping block” when the farmers spray-paint their arses red. God knows what green and blue mean. You know what farmers and their kind get up to…some funny-looking kids round here too.

Highland cattle look like bulls in Afghan coats with emo hair.

There’s a tree at the bottom of my back garden and I thought a load of birds were flocking around it late one night, but apparently they’re bats? Which is cool – or would be if I could see them properly, but it’s too dark now.

Do you guys have deer ticks and Lyme's disease in the UK? Not fun.

I was blissfully unaware of either when I lived in London. But yeah, they're a thing up here 🙁 But I tend to repulse mosquitos through alcohol abuse, so hopefully the booze is warding off the ticks too...
 
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version

Well-known member
Weird, I thought its skull and ribs would be visible…maybe somebody took them for their mantelpiece?

My dad did this with a badger he found. He didn't stick it on his mantelpiece, but he took it home and took the skeleton out. He just saw it as some sort of project. A continuation of his Zoology degree.
 

woops

is not like other people
Haven’t worked out the colour scheme but I think it means “for the chopping block” when the farmers spray-paint their arses red. God knows what green and blue mean.
i thought this was so the farmers don't get their flocks mixed up, like a bandanna in Dr Dre land
 

martin

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i thought this was so the farmers don't get their flocks mixed up, like a bandanna in Dr Dre land
Oh, maybe. The red ones belong to the Morrisons, the green ones belong to the Gunns. Makes sense.

Though I actually think the colour coding means: red=slaughter next week; green= fatten it up a bit first; blue= friends with benefits.

Forgot to mention, Iron Maiden are inexplicably popular up here, it's the only band T-shirt/car sticker I've seen. Fortunately I had Killers when I was 10, so I hope to assimilate further.
 

Clinamenic

Binary & Tweed
Just found a fucking tick on my back. We went upstate last weekend, did a bit of walking around in the woods, this bastard may have been on me all that time since then. It's late now, going to the doctor first thing tomorrow.

If I become paralyzed and unable to post here, please keep Choon of the Day, Redux alive in my memory.
Don’t worry, the Brooklyn culture mafia will remember you.
 

IdleRich

IdleRich
Walked down to the river to catch some air this evening - it is starting to get warm in the evenings and it was really sweltering in the day - and was momentarily taken aback to see a couple of sparks floating through the air a few centimetres from my chest. As they sputtered out and relit etc I realised that they were actually fireflies. I guess I have seen fireflies before but these were particularly beautiful - wikipedia says there are over 2,000 types so I guess some are prettier than others - and they really did look like floating embers from a fire. Didn't expect them to cross in front of me on a path by the river like that, though I suppose I have no idea where they live or how they behave.
 

Mr. Tea

Let's Talk About Ceps
catalog done those gruesome murders himself this is just his sick way of bragging about it
Tripping off his nut on liberty caps, dancing madly around a muddy field, caked in cow shit and mole-blood, head filled with fantasies of appeasing the chthonic gods of death and rebirth with sacrificial offerings like an Aztec priest, his ceremonial obsidian dagger a battered Victorinox penknife.
 

luka

Well-known member

the secret is not what’s above ; it’s called the Nibiruian cristal temple ; it’s a complex of cristal that connects earth to another 24 temples of cristals ; it’s also called the NET ; this is a major secret since the ancient times ; those temples were put there artificially to create a link between earth ; parallel earth that’s the anti particle contra part of our planet ;the sun ; and a planet called nibiru ; these cristals are the reason we lost our memory as race ; and what’s put Atlantis under the ocean .​

 

Mr. Tea

Let's Talk About Ceps
i've no idea but i think it's basically like display of trophy? can't see how it would put the other moles off
Yeah, I was joking - they're not known for spending much time above ground or having great eyesight, for one thing.
 

Mr. Tea

Let's Talk About Ceps
I think you're in a part of the country where a young gallant would do that to 'impress a lady'.
 
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